RE: The Estari Gateway Discussion thread


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1/11/2013 4:39:05

Glais
Member

Hm, so why weren't the certain stops really touched on? Found that kinda, weird.
Also why did they stay in FalconReach for a year when they needed to get to SwordHaven? Surely they could've found some time soon.

quote:

I'm only posting this so it is noticeable, and some of you will pay attention, to comment on it!!!

Eh, perhaps browse some others' stories. Can sometimes gain you new readers in the process. Often for me anyhow, if someone reads something I've written I try and make an effort to help them out as well.

Post #: 76

1/11/2013 10:40:08

Chaosweaver Amon
Friendly!

Well I didn't want to put all the traveling stuff in another chapter. And thank you for some advertising! :D I have a couple Ideas for the next chapter that I'm a bit torn between. Do you guys want another Grimlon chapter next? A Dashiell chapter next? Or just a chapter just to have some narration of the scenes around them?

Well, I got tired of waiting, so I made the new chapter, it's about Dashiell. If it feels a bit rushed...well I won't be surprised really, it seemed a bit fast paced to me too...well, if you think so then tell me and I'll 'stretch it out' a bit.

< Message edited by Chaosweaver Amon -- 2/25/2013 15:46:59 >

DF	Post #: 77

1/15/2013 0:42:00

Chaosweaver Amon
Friendly!

Well, just released ANOTHER new chapter, should have some revelations that may be a tad unexpected. I enjoyed writing this chapter...even if it took me about an hour and a half...and its now about a quarter to 1:00 AM So I will hope to get some feedback when I get up again! G'night!

< Message edited by Chaosweaver Amon -- 2/25/2013 15:47:10 >

DF	Post #: 78

1/15/2013 4:46:42

Dwelling Dragonlord

ArchKnight AQ / OOC / L&L

quote:

As Grimlon and the scarred one rolled over and over eachother, he has smashed in the face, and sent falling to his death, releasing a high pitched howl as he went.

was

quote:

He pawed away to the bare stone ground, big enough for him to stand in, right in the center of the terrain...and released another howl, twice as lound, and twice aas long as the last...

Nice chapter. So Grimlon is a wolf god who serves another.

AQW

Post #: 79

1/15/2013 11:00:00

Chaosweaver Amon
Friendly!

quote:

So Grimlon is a wolf god who serves another.
No...he isn't a god, just a werewolf...I'll fix thos typos now. :P And I would love some feedback on the chapter before Grimlon's, involving Dashiell.

< Message edited by Chaosweaver Amon -- 2/25/2013 15:47:22 >

DF	Post #: 80

1/15/2013 11:24:40

Dwelling Dragonlord

ArchKnight AQ / OOC / L&L

Well, that chapter seemed solid. However, since you did not posted the update in a new post I did not see it and assumed that chapter was still under construction. I didn't really get a sense that the plot was moving forward with the prisoners however.

P.S.: Would

AQW

Post #: 81

1/15/2013 12:23:22

Chaosweaver Amon
Friendly!

Ok, well did it seem rather rushed at all? It felt rather fast paced when I read over it again.

< Message edited by Chaosweaver Amon -- 2/25/2013 15:47:33 >

DF	Post #: 82

1/18/2013 14:51:49

Chaosweaver Amon
Friendly!

Well, the next chapter is going to be a Jack chapter, because I have started a little pattern, and I was wondering, because I don't really have any ideas for him yet, if you guys would like me to make the next Jack chapter just about their year in Falconreach, and the time they take traveling there. And by the way, if you hadn't already noticed, the time period through the story is not the same for each character. So far, Grimlon is farthest in the future (in the winter) then Dashiell is in Autumn, and Jack is in Autumn as well, but a bit earlier in. I am not saying that they all have different timelines and stuff, like, while Grimlon was traveling in the winter woods, heading toward Lord Frydae's castle, Jack is in Falconreach, enjoying the company of some local heroes and whatnot. Time is not really needed for Dashiell, because he is in prison and he won't take part in the main story for some time. Just wanted to clarify that.

ANYWAY. Main purpose of this post, should I think up something new to happen for Jack? or should it just be what happens while journeying to Falconreach, and what happens while he is there for part of it?

< Message edited by Chaosweaver Amon -- 2/25/2013 15:47:44 >

DF	Post #: 83

1/20/2013 21:32:03

Chaosweaver Amon
Friendly!

Well I'm going to introduce a new character who has been mentioned, not as a protagonist, but he will have his own chapters from time to time, mainly because I have no thought of what to do with Jack at the moment. And some other reasons. I had considered this before, I hope you guys enjoy when it comes up!

< Message edited by Chaosweaver Amon -- 2/25/2013 15:47:53 >

DF	Post #: 84

1/21/2013 19:37:43

Chaosweaver Amon
Friendly!

New chapter up. Half of this was to make the thread noticeable. I can't help but feel that my story is becoming less popular...

< Message edited by Chaosweaver Amon -- 2/25/2013 15:48:01 >

DF	Post #: 85

1/22/2013 6:43:14

Dwelling Dragonlord

ArchKnight AQ / OOC / L&L

quote:

He pulled on his baggy breeches, and his sealskin jacket over his rough saailcloth shirt.

sailcloth

quote:

"Food's with Brigg, be quick there ain't much left after Chib kicked over te barrell again."

the barrel

quote:

He nodded in response and headed across the deck into a separate cabin, where Brigg, a stout man with only six fingers in all was heating up some more fish over a metal barrell.

barrel

quote:

It wasn't the tastiest of things, and now and then there might be a couple shrimp, but it was satisfying enough.

of shrimps

quote:

He drew his spyglass out from his trouser pocket, and adjustedit to get a closer look.

adjusted it

You mention that they'll reach Sho'Nuff soon. It might be more interesting for the reader if you mentioned in which way the winds blow them, so the reader can somewhat estimate their location. Especially to me since Sho'Nuff has somewhat of a tropical climate.

Your readers are Legendium, deatharrows, glais(aurus_x) and myself. The former two haven't been active in L&L for a while.

AQW

Post #: 86

1/22/2013 14:14:01

Chaosweaver Amon
Friendly!

Ok, I'll work on those typos right away. Remember you won't see Veck anytime soon...but he will be included again. And in the end of the chapter when the Slaving ship is coming, that will DEFINITLEY alter their journey...

< Message edited by Chaosweaver Amon -- 2/25/2013 15:48:10 >

DF	Post #: 87

1/25/2013 23:05:26

Chaosweaver Amon
Friendly!

Well, next chapter is going to be about Jack, and I still need some opinions; should I make it about their journey to Falconreach, in proper detail? How they spent the year in Falconreach? Or, and entirely new setting, where the story progresses?
I am starting to even out the story a bit, to let Jack catch up, so in a couple chapters the timeline will be about the same for all of the characters.

< Message edited by Chaosweaver Amon -- 2/25/2013 15:48:19 >

DF	Post #: 88

1/31/2013 21:49:02

Chaosweaver Amon
Friendly!

Ok, I have run into a MAJOR ISSUE!!! You see, as I was rummaging through some useless facts about LotR, I noticed that the 'Istari' is the name of the group of wizards! Completely coincidental I swear it on my undeath! And now i think I'd better change the name to something else...I could use a couple suggestions...any help woiuld be marvelous!

< Message edited by Chaosweaver Amon -- 2/25/2013 15:48:30 >

DF	Post #: 89

2/1/2013 13:27:58

Master Samak
Productive!
Steward Leprechaun
L&L

I did find your title very close to Tolkien's word.

Oh, and Chaosweaver Amon?

quote:

You see, as I was rummaging through some useless facts about LotR,

Lord of the Rings facts are never useless. :)

< Message edited by Master Samak -- 2/1/2013 13:28:54 >

Post #: 90

2/1/2013 19:45:29

Chaosweaver Amon
Friendly!

@above touche but still need a new name!

< Message edited by Chaosweaver Amon -- 2/25/2013 15:48:43 >

DF	Post #: 91

2/2/2013 18:12:44

Dwelling Dragonlord

ArchKnight AQ / OOC / L&L

The Triangle Bridge?

spoiler:

As Jack is part human, part elf and part dwarf and that was the Estari Gateway to begin with.

On a sidenote, what sort of elves were Jack's ancestors anyway? You might need to specify that.

AQW

Post #: 92

2/2/2013 23:13:50

Chaosweaver Amon
Friendly!

spoiler:

Remember, this is quite a time before Sepulchure, the Rose etc. So I rather pictured the elves as being one race, then ending up being divided by some sort, as with the dwarves.

And as for the name, I meant a new name for the gods, the Estari are the gods, and later on you will learn more of them, so I need a separate name for them just to keep the story as original as possible, and on track to my original idea. BUT, earlier today I also did have this insane idea about a completely random ending...which I may use, but I won't tell you what it is And if I DID use it (which is less likely) it would matter very little what the name was.

< Message edited by Chaosweaver Amon -- 2/25/2013 15:49:09 >

DF	Post #: 93

2/5/2013 17:43:17

deatharrows
Member

Hi. I figured I might as well catch up on the story. However first this!

quote:

"He was a knight, who died when I was a babe

Baby not Babe unless you meant Babe which is a word but I believe you mean baby.

Also O.O this is awesome! At first I knew it was good but now.... It's awesome! I think it might even be on par with Faerdin's story! Good job Amon! Keep up the great story.

AQW

Post #: 94

2/7/2013 15:17:55

Chaosweaver Amon
Friendly!

Hey, I've decided now to do a chapter on the prisoners instead of Jack, so I can keep the timeline even, and so everything will now start to link together.

< Message edited by Chaosweaver Amon -- 2/25/2013 15:49:28 >

DF	Post #: 95

2/7/2013 21:03:56

Glais
Member

Wolf Chapter was your best one yet.
Nice job on that CW.
The one following wasn't bad either, though it seems like you have a ton of plot points going on now.

Post #: 96

2/7/2013 22:03:51

Chaosweaver Amon
Friendly!

@Glais Thanks, I was really proud of the wolf chapter and now a new chapter is up, involving the prisoners. And about all the separate plots, they are like different strings, and as I said, Veck's path isn't that important to this story. They will all end up tying together soon. After I finish this story, I am going to rewrite it! In an unabridged version, so it will be about 3 times as long as this one, with maybe a few extra backlines. Enjoy the newest chapter for now!

< Message edited by Chaosweaver Amon -- 2/25/2013 15:49:36 >

DF	Post #: 97

2/7/2013 22:29:19

Glais
Member

For some reason I've never liked Dashiell.
But his father sure is far, far worse.

Post #: 98

2/8/2013 21:38:37

Chaosweaver Amon
Friendly!

Well I'm very glad that you hate his father, that means I've made the character turn out well. But glad as I am, I can't help but say, that he was doing his duty when he beat the prisoners...I think I have FINALLY found a way to fit Jack into the next chapter without screwing up the timelines! :D

< Message edited by Chaosweaver Amon -- 2/25/2013 15:49:45 >

DF	Post #: 99

2/15/2013 20:40:33

Chaosweaver Amon
Friendly!

OK, starting the next chapter, should be about an hour or so. Jack and Achrion are heading to Swordhaven...

EDIT: Sorry, postponed until further notice...which will be in a day or two, don't worry!

EDIT2: Ok, I will now start the new chapter, should finish it this time uninterrupted.

< Message edited by Chaosweaver Amon -- 2/25/2013 15:49:54 >

DF	Post #: 100

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