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The Half-Wolf Commentary thread

 
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1/8/2012 20:23:08   
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General commentary thread for my story. Yeah, I know it's quite old, but according to Mritha I had to make a commentary thread, so here it is. :)


http://forums2.battleon.com/f/tm.asp?m=18807644 is my story

< Message edited by Eukara Vox -- 1/8/2012 21:50:31 >
AQW Epic  Post #: 1
1/8/2012 20:50:45   
Mritha
Legendary AdventureGuide!


It was in interesting read, I liked the part where Mike used Google Translator, it added a nice real world effect to the story.

However when someone speaks, that should start a new paragraph. In chapter 3, though there were several people speaking, it was all one paragraph. Breaking it up by speech will make it easier to follow.
DF MQ AQW  Post #: 2
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