Home  | Login  | Register  | Help  | Play 

=AQ= The Fall of the Fisherman War Stories and Poems Commentary

 
Logged in as: Guest
  Printable Version
All Forums >> [Gaming Community] >> [Legends and Lore] >> Writers of Lore >> Works Discussion >> AE Fanfiction Discussion >> =AQ= The Fall of the Fisherman War Stories and Poems Commentary
Forum Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
9/14/2012 14:16:13   
Elryn

Custodian (DF)


=AQ= The Fall of the Fisherman War Stories and Poems

Here is where you may discuss each other's war stories if not in the war thread in the game forum.


< Message edited by Elryn -- 9/14/2012 14:17:58 >
AQ  Post #: 1
9/14/2012 14:17:45   
Mortarion
Member

The link isn't working
AQ DF MQ AQW Epic  Post #: 2
9/18/2012 19:55:16   
Tep Itaki
Friendly!


It was a good read, just caught a small error in grammar with GE's talking about raising Jacques to his feet.

quote:

we shall raise him on his feet again.


It's a good opening chapter for the war story. I'll go back and read again if I have time.

Also like the fact that everyone was looking to Rai for a witty remark.

< Message edited by Tep Itaki -- 9/18/2012 19:56:02 >
AQ DF MQ AQW  Post #: 3
9/19/2012 4:56:15   
Golden Emperor
Member

Hahaha I'm loving the story, especially my part
AQ  Post #: 4
9/21/2012 18:12:58   
Tha Killa
Member

Can't wait to read chapter 3:)
AQ  Post #: 5
9/21/2012 18:19:00   
  Dwelling Dragonlord

ArchKnight AQ / OOC / L&L


It's very nice, but what do you mean by this?

quote:

Rather than inanimate, it felt alive yet at book.
AQ DF AQW  Post #: 6
9/23/2012 17:10:52   
Elryn

Custodian (DF)


Oops... Typoes fixed. Chapter 3 is out as well. If you see any spelling mistakes in that one, do tell.
AQ  Post #: 7
9/23/2012 17:16:10   
  Dwelling Dragonlord

ArchKnight AQ / OOC / L&L


quote:

The first thing I am aware off is the cold and utter darkness.

of

quote:

nearly toppling over other soldier in the process.

another soldier/other soldiers
AQ DF AQW  Post #: 8
9/23/2012 17:44:24   
Tha Killa
Member

quote:

the sent of the Paxian soil wrapped in

Scent
I'm loving this story Elryn, hurry up with Chapter 4 please
AQ  Post #: 9
9/23/2012 18:31:31   
Elryn

Custodian (DF)


Typoes corrected. Many thanks, Killa, Dwelling. Chapter 4 is up and the story is almost done.

< Message edited by Elryn -- 9/23/2012 18:32:24 >
AQ  Post #: 10
9/23/2012 19:41:06   
Tha Killa
Member

Damm Elryn that's pretty deep, I'm guessing most if not all of Chapter 4 is based on real life?
AQ  Post #: 11
9/23/2012 19:57:10   
Elryn

Custodian (DF)


Not really. The exert is from the old Mostly Harmful War Stories actually.
AQ  Post #: 12
9/23/2012 21:53:52   
Tha Killa
Member

Well that was a fail on my part
AQ  Post #: 13
9/24/2012 2:29:39   
Elryn

Custodian (DF)


Last Chapter is done. It turned out to be longer than I expected. Say true, there is likely quite a few typoes judging by the length of it, but I need to rest a bit before I take another look at it.
AQ  Post #: 14
9/24/2012 9:06:45   
Golden Emperor
Member

*Applauses Elryn's war story*

Feel free to use GE again in any of your future stories.
AQ  Post #: 15
9/24/2012 9:58:45   
  Dwelling Dragonlord

ArchKnight AQ / OOC / L&L


quote:

We fret about too many things some times I suppose.

sometimes, I suppose

quote:

After slaying more monsters BlackAces returns to camp as night falls to rest for another day of the war. While at camp BlackAces begins to think to himself:

returned, fell

quote:

I wonder how long I can keep battling<> I've been through so many wars I've lost count of how many monsters I've slain.

,/.

quote:

Elryn: "After this war is over I will be leaving BattleOn as I believe I will need to travel outside of my hometown in order to progress myself as an ArchMagi<> there is only so much I can learn here. I do not know how long I will be gone for<> but I will surely return one day more powerful than the day I left."

,/. | ,


Since when is BattleOn Elryn's hometown? I thought you said he was raised somewhere else?


quote:

BlackAces: "I see<> well it is understandable there is only so much one can learn from one place<> you need to move and travel to learn new things in order to become more powerful, I went on a trip like this once a few years ago I was gone approximately a year and I learnt quite a bit so I believe it will do you good.

,/.

quote:

Mystical Warrior: "You are embarking on quite the journey Elryn<> I wish you luck and hope that you remain safe on your travels and return safely whenever that may be."

Elryn: "Thank you both for your kinds words but I feel like I interrupted something as I arrived, did I?"

,/. | kind, as if, didn't

quote:

Elryn: "I see<> so you were discussing the new age of heroes that will have to replace the legacy left behind<> well there are lots of capable heroes out there that can carry on in our absence."

, | ?

quote:

Mystical Warrior: "That's what we were just discussing before<> but I think we should discuss that more in detail once the war is over and focus on what we need to do now."

Elryn: "I'm glad I wasn't the only one thinking about this on my way back to camp<> but I see your point we should discuss matters like this once the war is done with."

,

Forgive me, but the last three sentences felt like repeating yourself three times over.

quote:

The three continue to talk about their plans on the final day of the war...

continued

quote:

''Jacques has been bestowed the power of Earth, Wind and Darkness by the clans.

Water

quote:

Where a moment ago layed Jacques now lied three of him.

stood/lied (A chicken/dragon laying an egg or an egg lying in the sun.)

quote:

A roar came from the Jacques three.

third Jacques/three copies of Jacques

quote:

Right before him lied a gear portal.

Unless I'm not getting the right picture here, "had opened up".

quote:

It has been causing us a worlds of trouble... But ti seems BlackAces now has things under control.''

world(?), it

quote:

his sight does not cross Jacques as though he is not worth looking at.

did, was

quote:

From their position, the guardians may see BlackAces unsheathing his sword, the Striborg Blade.

witnessed

quote:

Tears drops of pure azure rise from the ground around BlackAces, like rains drop dropping from a cloud in reversed gravity.

Teardrops, rose, raindrops

quote:

An azure blue glow fills BlackAces's eyes.

filled

quote:

''On it!'' And with that, Karuna dashed off for the battleground of the two fighters.

Don't you mean six?
AQ DF AQW  Post #: 16
9/24/2012 11:16:11   
Elryn

Custodian (DF)


That is one thing. The exert is BlackAces's Mostly Harmful War story. I would not worry about correcting that part. Typoes included. I am working on the rest however.
AQ  Post #: 17
9/24/2012 19:55:10   
Tha Killa
Member

*Applauses for a good hour*
Loved the story Elryn! Feel free to use Killa again in any story and next time, let me save someone
Great Job!!!!!!
AQ  Post #: 18
Page:   [1]
All Forums >> [Gaming Community] >> [Legends and Lore] >> Writers of Lore >> Works Discussion >> AE Fanfiction Discussion >> =AQ= The Fall of the Fisherman War Stories and Poems Commentary
Jump to:



Advertisement




Icon Legend
New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Forum Content Copyright © 2018 Artix Entertainment, LLC.

"AdventureQuest", "DragonFable", "MechQuest", "EpicDuel", "BattleOn.com", "AdventureQuest Worlds", "Artix Entertainment"
and all game character names are either trademarks or registered trademarks of Artix Entertainment, LLC. All rights are reserved.
PRIVACY POLICY


Forum Software © ASPPlayground.NET Advanced Edition