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Issue 38 - Science is Fun (Stormfyre)

 
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1/18/2009 14:32:38   
smbdoll
Member

Science is Fun! Especially with FIRE!
by Stormfyre

Hello everyone. Stormfyre here back from a looooooooooooooooooo...*BREATH*...oooooooooooong hiatus. Okay, I lied. I'm not really back. But I'd like to share this article with you! It's not a SERIOUS article (that would be no fun!). Instead, I'm giving all you dragon owners out there a sales pitch for my newest product.

Are you ready for this?....

....

....

DRAGON BUBBLEGUM!

No, not bubblegum made from dragons (eew). That would be nasty and full of scales and extremely hard to chew. I'm talking about bubblegum made FOR dragons! This one and only new product was specifically tailored for your baby (or adult) dragon to chew and flame to its heart's content. We have colors all across the rainbow, so the more fashion-minded of you can match with your own dragons' colors.

Custom color mixes are available upon request.

Order yours today!

*Ahem*

Now, back to the science behind the gum (you knew this was coming right?). As you all know, dragons all have the ability to produce flame, even at a very young age (I believe your baby dragons were able to flame right after hatching, yes?). For those of you who have taken chemistry, you will know that certain metal ions will burn with certain colors.

So, a rundown of what exactly you are putting into your dragon:

Red: Strontium salts
Orange: Calcium salts (No, your milk will not burn orange)
Yellow: Sodium salts (yes, including table salt, if you can heat it up enough)
Green: Barium salts
Blue: Copper compounds
Purple: Mixing strontium and copper compounds

If you burn them in real life, they will really make those colors. I promise!

Needless to say, you should NEVER put any of these compounds into your mouth (with the exception of table salt), and absolutely should not try to light them (while in your mouth or not), or you will likely find yourself with a Darwin Award faster than you can say "my tongue!"

So remember, kids: chemistry is fun, but lab safety comes first!

If you're having trouble figuring out what to get your dragon for holidays or birthdays, then this is the perfect gift!

~Stormfyre out and Stay Safe!
Apparently, he has forgotten how to write articles.
AQ  Post #: 1
1/18/2009 21:19:53   
KappaPirate
Member

Hahaha!! Darwin Awards :P. I remember one of the ladies got one from getting off a safari van when there was a Lion in the bushes. And she got pounced and pwned. Then at her funeral she got a Darwin Award and i was ROFL'ing like crazy when i read that on the Darwin Award Site.
MQ  Post #: 2
1/21/2009 15:20:26   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


Science is fun? What if you are mad at science from playing Kingdom of Loathing? But this is a really neat article; I like how you blend in scientific fact (though I hate facts) with them. Come back soon! Or else!
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 3
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