Cataclysm -> RE: Oddball's Tale Discussion! (9/18/2011 15:41:57)
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I see mostly cosmetic changes, though the frequency with which you end dialogue without punctuation is certainly jarring. I'm also not quite sure why you have the speaking attribution (i.e. Fred said) on a separate line. Just a random example I'm copy+pasting: quote:
"Hey, I was going to eat that" Odd whined at Shadows Should be: quote:
"Hey, I was going to eat that," Odd whined at Shadows. (exclamation point instead of comma is a plausible option here) Grammatical issues aside (they're one of my pet peeves when it comes to stories), it looks like the start of something interesting. I wonder where this'll take us... I suspect somewhere good, no doubt. I've got a sneaking suspicion of some plot details, but I'll abstain from posting anything in regards to that. Good job so far, and I feel like it will only end up getting better.
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