The Half-Wolf Commentary thread


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1/8/2012 20:23:08

febmaster
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General commentary thread for my story. Yeah, I know it's quite old, but according to Mritha I had to make a commentary thread, so here it is. :)

http://forums2.battleon.com/f/tm.asp?m=18807644 is my story

< Message edited by Eukara Vox -- 1/8/2012 21:50:31 >

AQW

Epic

Post #: 1

1/8/2012 20:50:45

Mritha
Legendary AdventureGuide!

It was in interesting read, I liked the part where Mike used Google Translator, it added a nice real world effect to the story.

However when someone speaks, that should start a new paragraph. In chapter 3, though there were several people speaking, it was all one paragraph. Breaking it up by speech will make it easier to follow.

AQW

Post #: 2

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