smbdoll
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Editor's Note
by Eukara
March 27, 2009.
I will remember this day for a very long time. Not for any famous reasonings that you may find in a newspaper, magazine or anthology. This day was the last day of classes for the semester in a homeschool program called REACH. I teach in this program, which is something I take great pride and pleasure in. But that isn't the focus of this note, as March 27th was also the last time I would have a particular student in my classroom. She has been a very intricate part of my life, as her love of learning, writing and life have been very influential to me. She reminds me a lot of myself at her age. And not only is this girl important to me, but her entire family has meant much to my own.
Her father is military, and as such, must move to where he will better serve when commanded. I have known this for a couple of months, yet that day was the first time it hit me that this was real. And I was overcome that evening with an emotion that I hadn't felt in a long time - grief. Grief in knowing that soon enough, I would not see that smiling face on Friday and Sunday mornings and receive the cheerful surprise hugs.
Having to come to terms with all this was difficult. How does one say goodbye to a part of their lives that had meant so much to them? I know this isn't a matter of life and death, and perhaps many people will think this silly or strange of me to dwell upon so much. And yet, as I looked forward to April and eventually May, I was reminded of something.
There is nothing final in this life. Summer burns the ground, scorching the plants, turning them brown. The wind blows away soil and dead plant matter, leaving the ground parched and cracked, dying for a drop of moisture. Winter comes, snow falls, water freezes, plants go dormant and the world looks dead. The stillness is overwhelming; the lack of color is stifling. Yet, there is an end to it. Fall brings rains that replenish the water supplies and gives plants what is needed to produce their progeny for the next year. Spring brings rebirth, slowly spreading color and life throughout the lands we inhabit.
I see the anticipated bluebonnets bloom down here and I smile. Despite the horrendous drought we have been experiencing, a couple of days' rain has brought life to the hillsides and fields. Things have rapidly greened up, making the land I live in seem as if there never was a drought to begin with. Patchworks of blue, yellow, orange and red scatter here and there, while birds flit around to catch the newly emerged insects taking advantage of the plant growth. There is life now, in this spring time, and it has taught me much.
The move is not the final chapter in the lives of both my family and hers. There are ways of getting around this obstacle. Email is a good friend and will be much used. I have taken a step to widen my teaching horizons, venturing into website creation, so that my classes can be put on the web - providing a place not just for learning, but also for talking - so that this student and her friends from this phase of life can get together and catch up. A bold adventure for me, as I will have to go beyond my comfort zone to accomplish this. But all these things still keep me connected; the family, knowing this, is excited about the adventure ahead.
Take a look around you as you venture out this spring. Go for a walk and remember what it took for those flowers and newly-put-out leaves to go through to appear. Then remember that, even if you go through "dead times," pain, loss ... that there is something waiting to bloom in its place. I am not saying it won't be a challenge, but you may find yourself stronger or more adventurous because of it. And, you may learn something about yourself along the way. Don't let the stuff that grieves you become a finality. Force it to make you better, stronger and, like spring, flourish in the wake of hardship.
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