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(DF) Inferno Discussion

 
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6/23/2012 15:43:21   
Moglin Crazed09
Member

The story of a Half-Dragon, conceived through magic with a peculiar destiny.

What, exactly, is Inferno born to do? His family of origin seems to be strongly against dragon kind, yet he is born through one of Akriloth's greatest generals...

The name of the story isn't "Inferno" specifically for the character- the plot itself will unveil the name of the Fan Fic in due time. I've only got the prologue- which is full of time skips, sadly- up thus far, and am working to get at least two more chapters up ASAP. To anyone who wants to discuss the events thus far or speculate on some of the things that have happened...Have at it.

Also, if you have any critique-ing to do, please do it. I'm looking to improve as best I can throughout Inferno's adventures.

< Message edited by Moglin Crazed09 -- 6/23/2012 15:58:50 >
DF MQ AQW  Post #: 1
6/24/2012 2:50:57   
Glais
Member

Writing seems pretty solid.

Story wise, two main things I noticed. Dragons eating their mother is pretty weird. And the Dra'Kin are Half Dragons yes? AE had already actually come up with a name for half Dragons, that being Vartai.
DF MQ  Post #: 2
6/24/2012 6:45:58   
  Dwelling Dragonlord

ArchKnight AQ / OOC / L&L


I had a hard time imagining Flamestorm to craft a sword and clothes.

Another thing I find strange is that Flamestorm gave birth to a Wind dragon, that just blew my mind. Dragons naturally inherit the element of their parents after all. I think you might need to explain this a bit better.

Other than that the story seems fine.

@glaisaurus_x: The Dra'Kin seem to be something different, after all it was not until Inferno was transported into a dragon egg he became a Vartai. Not sure how that works though.

< Message edited by Dwelling Dragonlord -- 6/24/2012 6:53:58 >
AQ DF AQW  Post #: 3
6/27/2012 23:41:42   
Moglin Crazed09
Member

@ DD's questions and Eating thy Mother question: Flamestorm crafting stuff- I meant to hint towards her using her human form and magic for that. It'd been a while since I'd written more than a couple hundred words, which is why I posted this to get advice and un-rustify myself.

My idea with her giving birth to a Wind dragon...Well... You can infer that Inferno is obviously Fire-based, on his name and the color of his Runes alone, and so is Pyrus. I won't delve TOO much into that-but it will be important later. (edited a bit.)

The idea with eating the mother was half a reference to Futurama, and also to Elder Scrolls where you can eat a Deadra Heart or a Knight of Order's heart, and in Skyrim you gather Dragon Souls by killing them. The latter of the hearts increases strength permanently, the prior increasing health like a potion, and as far as I know, Dragon Souls give you powers and stuff. Futurama says, "Eat the Heart, for Courage!" It's also a bit of a Highlander reference, in the sense that eating the brain grants the consumer that dragon's intellect, hearts increase the length of life and health and such. Eating the body would grant the consumer whatever Manna lingers, I figure, acting as the Soul.

Think of it as one of those weird traditions you hear about in Aztec culture and such that was eventually shunned by society. It won't wind up being too story important, other than to serve as a creeping people out factor. Or it might. I haven't thought too far ahead, aside from a few ending and midway events.

The events taking place are a LONG time before our Hero and Dragon are born- I don't know enough WoG to say WHEN, exactly, but pretty old.

The Dra'kin, believe it or not, are not normally related to Dragons in anyway, and are a reference to Dovah'kin, the Dragon Born/Ultimate Dragon Slayer. Inferno is one of three exceptions. Once again, I don't want to say TOO much, but I can say that between "The Ancient Battle that Started A Lot of Peace Treaties," as I have no set name for it (yet,) and Inferno's birth, they existed for the same reason Nukes exist. To stop wars from happening.

EDIT: Alright...Some of that's actually a lie, due to the TABtSALoP (The Ancient Battle that Started a Lot of Peace Treaties,) because the Dra'kin do have a very diluted relation to a Dragon family. Which one? You'll have to wait and see, of course, but it's probably going to be obvious once I move into the main part of the story. But most Dra'kin resemble Humans more than Dragons, and even Inferno looks more like an Elf of some kind than a Vartai. I think I'll use the awesome looking hair from them, though.

@ Glaisaur's Vartai question: That was poor wording on my part. Flamestorm's mind is clouded by the magic Tanien used, which is basically increasing the flow of estrogen in her, making her act more motherly and such- to use a real life term, anyway. Normally, she would only treat a Dragon like this, and a good one at that, and she'd only give some attention to a Vartai. However, she is aware enough to know Inferno is not a full Dragon, hence she referred to him as a "Half Dragon." The magic is actively preventing her from realizing she's raising what is essentially a human.

In reality, Inferno is something more like...a 1/3 Dragon, maybe?

I hope any of that made sense- it's close to midnight and I haven't had much caffeine today, so I might have used poor wording. If anything else needs fixed or explaining, just lemme know.


< Message edited by Moglin Crazed09 -- 6/27/2012 23:56:22 >
DF MQ AQW  Post #: 4
6/27/2012 23:43:53   
Glais
Member

Nah, that preeeetty much cleared up everything.
DF MQ  Post #: 5
6/27/2012 23:48:57   
Moglin Crazed09
Member

ah. Alright. I don't think I revealed anything too important, mostly because a lot of this is going to end up scattered about monologues by expendable characters soon, but...-hopes he didn't-

OH! The other thing is, this Akriloth is not the same Akriloth from the fire war- he's at least a generation or two separated from him/her. And a piece of advice for figuring out location is using the map in Dragon Fable- you might find an interesting easter egg or two based on the locations.

< Message edited by Moglin Crazed09 -- 6/27/2012 23:51:44 >
DF MQ AQW  Post #: 6
7/2/2012 18:45:19   
Glais
Member

Wait so there's multiple Akriloths?
DF MQ  Post #: 7
7/3/2012 13:50:10   
Beshin Adin
Member
 

Lot of dragon protagonists lately..........
AQ AQW  Post #: 8
7/3/2012 19:19:31   
Moglin Crazed09
Member

Well... I created a second Prologue. After the threads in Dragon Fable's forums, I decided using a separate Lore might be safer- which means I'll be posting Chapter One itself once I'm prepared. My plan is to put out at least two chapters up before the week after next, then develop another two or three while I'm offline.

In this Lore, we're dealing with 'Akriloth I.' By the time this Lore reached the Fire War's era, there would be a second Akriloth, who would be preparing to give birth to Akriloth III- Akriloth Junior in DF.

@Beshen: He isn't exactly a Dragon; he is partially Dragon, yes, but he lacks a Dragon form as of now. Also, it is a Dragonfable Fanfic subforum.

< Message edited by Moglin Crazed09 -- 7/3/2012 19:21:23 >
DF MQ AQW  Post #: 9
7/11/2012 18:57:29   
Glais
Member

Ugh, multiversy stuff. That is just a quirk I don't like though and has no effect on your story.

Rainbow...with...cat...............
DF MQ  Post #: 10
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