RE: Ethereal Poetry - Comments - Latest: Who Are You?


	Home \| Login \| Register \| Help \| Play

RE: Ethereal Poetry - Comments - Latest: Who Are You?

Logged in as: Guest

Printable Version

All Forums >> [Gaming Community] >> [Legends and Lore] >> Writers of Lore >> Works Discussion >> Other Creative Works Discussion >> RE: Ethereal Poetry - Comments - Latest: Who Are You?

Page 2 of 2

Forum Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

1/10/2009 15:06:57

~Shade~
Member

Totally! I do it sometimes too.

Anyways, it's cool. Thanks for commenting!

~Shade~

Post #: 26

1/23/2009 19:01:37

~Shade~
Member

Newest poem is up. solace in the bathtub

~Shade~

Post #: 27

1/24/2009 14:56:54

Firefly
Lore-ian

quote:

my slow breath fogging the frosted glass

I suggest you kill "slow" Breath can't really be slow, imo. Breathing can, but that kinda jars the flow.

Ah, I see that you've taken to trying for the "no punctuation, no capitals" thing. Excellent--funny enough, I've recently been doing some experimenting on my own by writing freeverse and attacking less lofty, more ordinary matters.

Not sure if it was intentional, but this seems like it's almost implying redemption or something with these lines:

quote:

that i think i might lie there until i die
slowly being cleansed

Yeah, so that translates into "I liked" in my long-winded way. ;)

AQ	Post #: 28

1/25/2009 10:38:44

~Shade~
Member

:P That's good, Firefly. Glad you enjoyed. Not only is it supposed to mean cleansed as in, "Ha, Mom, see? I'm not all dirty from playing outside! NOW can I play video games?" (that was a weird example....) but also redemption. I've read lots of books where people are redeemed, and I figured a nice bath would work (A case in point being The Bell Jar, by Sylvia Plath. I don't know if you've read it, but after a long night of partying and going home with a friend and her new date, Esther Greenwood returns to her hotel and takes a nice, long, incredibly hot bath.)

My way of saying thank you, in a freaky sorta way.

~Shade~

Post #: 29

2/16/2009 21:22:10

er23.
Member

Okay. Some spare time, finally. No homework today, yay!

Missed your poetry loads, Shade. I'm glad to see that you have some new pieces up.

Random Poem: I like it. Especially when it talks about how the quills fly in different emotions.

quote:

The land of lots of poetry, with little bits of verse.

The first part of the sentence sounds a little bit to crammed. You could cut the "land of lots of", but it's fine if you don't cut it.

She: Don't worry Shade (though Firefly will probably have assured you already), it's not bad at all. We all have our emotional rushes.

quote:

I’m not that cool.
Just a poetic nerd!

I think instead of the period after cool, it should be a comma.

Post #: 30

2/28/2009 9:05:41

~Shade~
Member

Doesn't appear that I'll have to fix She, Er.

New poem. This one is going to be labeled by me, "READ AT YOUR OWN RISK".

I hope you enjoy it if you do, but, again, I have to doubt that.

She, Too (Impulsively Quit)

~Shade~

Post #: 31

2/28/2009 18:56:08

Firefly
Lore-ian

I read it. It's good. The structure is very creative and the feelings hit in hard. I wish you well, Shade. Waxing and waning, creating and breaking, is part of life. I have more specific feelings and comments, but I don't think they're suitable for this thread. I'll catch you on IRC sometime.

AQ	Post #: 32

3/14/2009 19:24:34

~Shade~
Member

Thanks, Firefly.

I want to announce that I'm probably not going to be writing for a while. This shouldn't be much news, as I'm nothing if not unproductive. That said, I am more busy than usual, and I've gotten some... problems... handed to me recently. My great-grandfather has developed pancreatic cancer along with liver cancer. Being 84, he's been given a prognosis of approximately two weeks to three months. We're working on taking care of him and my great-grandmother, so I'm quite busy now, helping them out, staying nights on the weekends, etc.

Hope you have a good morning/day/evening/night.

Yours truly,
-~-Shade-~-

Post #: 33

3/24/2009 16:37:02

~Shade~
Member

He's dead.

Post #: 34

3/25/2009 18:22:29

Arthur The Brave One
Member

0_o que?! Who's dead? You aren't dead shade... are you? Shade? Shaaaaaaaaaaade? Shadeeeeeeeeeeee? Shaddddddddddddde? Meow? <:3
Anywayz... I liked your last piece... and I just kinda dropped by to say hi :)
Juuuuuuuuuuuustiiiiiiiiiiice.... will prevail! (if we just keep waiting long enough >.>)

Post #: 35

3/25/2009 18:25:44

~Shade~
Member

Yeah... I probably won't be able to contribute. I have so much going on I can barely write. But I suppose one can try.

quote:

My great-grandfather has developed pancreatic cancer along with liver cancer.

He died.

~Shade~

Post #: 36

10/25/2009 22:44:15

~Shade~
Member

New poem up. It doesn't have a title.

Post #: 37

11/26/2009 18:01:12

Firefly
Lore-ian

You'll probably hate me for coming to this a month late. But I'm here, and I read "Untitled."

I like how you're experimenting with new structure, and some of the imagery was quite nice. I do feel like I'm missing the point though. I mean, I have a feeling it has a deeper meaning, but the only one I can think of is probably too... well, let's just say you do /not/ want to know what it is.

AQ	Post #: 38

12/15/2009 18:07:55

~Shade~
Member

Well, I'd love to hear what your idea is. And I really don't mind the month late thing. I have been the busiest at school and L&L has been far from my mind. It's becoming harder and harder to return or write, because my English teacher has decided that the most efficient way of teaching is to make sure our grubby little fingers develop early onset arthritis by assigning the largest amount of essays I've ever seen.

I really don't know what I'll do...

I'll let you know what it WAS later. Oh, and we missed my birthday.

~Shade~

Post #: 39

11/13/2011 17:09:11

Lady Veryon
Member

quote:

But the door slowly opens,
And soon the pain will flow.

Firstly, I adore this sonnet. Very nice flow-wise (which is the great nit-pick from me when it comes to Poetry), but the words mean something too. It's a good mix of enjoyable things.

I could go through these pages of Poetry and find tiny details, tiny flaws. In the end, though, it's the heart that matters, and your heart pours out through these tiny, well-written posts. I think it's the flaws that make the true Poet, and you are one.

I'll be haunting here often.

V

_____________________________

There is a song in my heart
and it greets your smile.
If our hearts can sing together,
I will call us friends.

Post #: 40

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

All Forums >> [Gaming Community] >> [Legends and Lore] >> Writers of Lore >> Works Discussion >> Other Creative Works Discussion >> RE: Ethereal Poetry - Comments - Latest: Who Are You?

Page 2 of 2

Jump to:

Icon Legend

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Forum Content Copyright © 2018 Artix Entertainment, LLC.

"AdventureQuest", "DragonFable", "MechQuest", "EpicDuel", "BattleOn.com", "AdventureQuest Worlds", "Artix Entertainment"
and all game character names are either trademarks or registered trademarks of Artix Entertainment, LLC. All rights are reserved.
PRIVACY POLICY