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(HS) Two Evils... Commentary Thread

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5/27/2011 17:34:11   
Defiant
Member

All comments to do with my HeroSmash based story here please! No hardcore flaming, but constructive criticism allowed!

Link to story: HERE!

CHAPTERS UP:
Chapter #0...
Chapter #1 - A Man Of Sneaky Dealings
Chapter #2 - A SkullDeep Cave
Chapter #3 - Sneaky Going Ons

UPDATE 7th JUNE 2011: So, Chapter 3 was just released. It was fairly short and maybe not top quality; I admit I rushed it and I shouldn't have. Chapter 4 will be a turning point to the story; you will see bigger chapters and an intricate storyline forming. I am still looking for a main villain for my story, so... PM me if interested.

< Message edited by Defiant -- 6/7/2011 14:23:49 >
Post #: 1
5/27/2011 18:35:04   
zanathos
Member

Nothing really much to comment on, since the first-ish chapter is really vague, but I just wanted to let you know That I'll be looking forward to the rest of your story, as will all of the other Smash Authors! (finally came up with a name for us, unless someone has a better one)
DF MQ AQW  Post #: 2
5/28/2011 7:13:46   
megakyle777
Member

I am liking the story so far. I wonder what The dealer is planning?

Oh, just so you know for the future, the character is not meant to be like a "MUHAHAHAHAH I WILL KILL ALL HEROES!" kind of person. He's more of a gentlemen, the kind of guy who will talk politly about events and offer the heroes a (Surprisingly NOT poisoned) drink while slowly reaching for a weapon should things get out of hand. But I can see why he would be a but surly here.
DF  Post #: 3
5/28/2011 7:19:36   
Defiant
Member

Kyle, I know he's not like that. Ever since your character came up, I had my own image of him which is much similar to, well, yours. I think you'll like what I have planned for The Dealer... I find I should explain he will be one of the biggest characters in this story; he will play a big part.
Post #: 4
5/28/2011 10:56:45   
Velmur
Member

Heh, I like it. I'll he happy to see what else will happen.
(Off-topic) We're both using our characters as avvies

< Message edited by Velmur -- 5/28/2011 10:57:41 >
AQ DF MQ AQW Epic  Post #: 5
5/28/2011 22:15:26   
Jae10
Creative!
Constructive!


 < Your story is written very well. I like the flow so far and how the plot was set up. Now my only question is...Just what is that shady guy up to!?
AQW  Post #: 6
5/29/2011 1:56:53   
megakyle777
Member

Is it not obvious?

spoiler:

Shady things!
DF  Post #: 7
5/29/2011 9:21:36   
Jae10
Creative!
Constructive!


 < Oh, haha. Just read chapter 2. This tale is getting better and better. Wow, glad he didn't use that knife or things would have been messy! XD
AQW  Post #: 8
5/29/2011 9:23:25   
megakyle777
Member

Oh please, like The Dealer would use such crass methods unless he had to.

Anyway, love the new chapter!
DF  Post #: 9
6/7/2011 19:17:21   
Jae10
Creative!
Constructive!


 < Very impressive new Chapter Def. I am in absolute suspense now. I wonder who is in charge of these suspicious dealings in HeroSpire (besides The Dealer, of course XD).
AQW  Post #: 10
6/7/2011 19:54:36   
Drakkoniss
Creative!
Constructive!


 On to the discussion...

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's ok... I wouldn't listen to them, if I were you... perhapse I can be a rogue hero in your story, who is ignoring the whims of HeroSpire...

Remember that the villains in SkullDeep don't attack me anymore, so if you choose to add me in your story, perhapse use that, eh? Perhapse my Alliance could be filled with others who do not care about the rules and intend to fight for good against the wishes of the corrupt one... enteresting, El Tigre...

That is a sucky acronym... I doubt that was even what it meant...
DF  Post #: 11
8/1/2012 23:36:19   
Kinzdor
Member

Love the story, really wish it would be contuined.
AQ DF MQ AQW Epic  Post #: 12
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