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Maegwyn -> Issue 35 - The Hard Truths of Mogloween (Circe) (11/5/2008 18:46:34)
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The Hard Truths of Mogloween
By Circe
The current holiday on everyone's mind is Mogloween. Everyone is getting out their light weapons in preparation for all the spooky monsters that come out this time of the year. Hunting candy and monsters is the pastime of October, but what does it really mean?
The first syllable of Mogloween contains "Mog," referencing Moglins, implying that this is a holiday particularly enjoyed by that species. Specifically in DragonFable, the Moglins continue to devour the candy that makes them grow to enormous proportions and become rampaging beasts. So then, despite the effect of this practice for the naive adventurer, Moglins have three things to enjoy about this holiday: the candy, the spotlight, and the terror.
Moglins become their polar opposite on Mogloween: big instead of small, brutish instead of staid, and opponent instead of ally. Even Zorbak is a potential guest in DragonFable, implying that despite his shenanigans, he is still more on our side than anyone else's. Moreover, there's no reason to assume that the Frostvale Moglins don't also partake in this holiday, implying that Mogloween is a universal for Moglins, rather than specifically limited to those you encounter as you trick or treat. Just because we don't specifically see Papa Moglin or Chilly doesn't mean they are not one of the Moglinsters we battle.
So what does all this presuming and assuming mean? Why, that a conspiracy is afoot! Is it really probable that the Cauldron sisters, with all their business and magical know-how, could let so much candy slip from their grasp? I mean, the evil "mastermind" of this year's Mogloween is a delusional child! Sally can't be more than nine years old, and she appears dim-witted enough to be duped by a talking pot into believing that evil beings that run rampant in the Necropolis are her friends.
We, here at the Association for the Protection and Care of Moglins, are not so easily manipulated. No way is a child responsible for the mayhem and chaos that follows each and every Mogloween. We scoff at the notion that this is all just some innocent coincidence that just happens to result in the brutal attack of Moglins that have had their size genetically altered, as if they had enrolled in some kind of drug trial.
Oh no, did I let a secret slip? That's right folks, drug trial. I propose that the Cauldron sisters are actually mad scientists, using Moglin test subjects to perfect their size-enhancing formula. But why would they need to alter the size of Moglins? To take over the world, of course! What creature is more impeccably suited to being a henchman than Moglins? They're so eager to please, friendly and, let's face it, not the brightest crayon in the pack, so they're perfectly poised to be manipulated into deeds of the more nefarious sort. Add eight feet and they're an order-following, adventurer-attacking, world-conquering machine!
Thank about that the next time you volunteer to gather up candy for the Cauldron sisters.
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