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Dwelling Dragonlord -> RE: Oddball's Tale Discussion! (10/2/2011 11:09:06)
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*Rises from the shadows.*
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Shadows walked off, leaving Odd behind too think about what just happened, He only thought for a moment and then decided to catch up with his new friend.
to
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Shadows and Odd suddenly went black, their eyes yellow.
This reminds me of tigerlady48's story about raven.
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backwards, The
This happens quite a lot, either make the , a . or the T a t. That said, I notice you never end your sentences with a .
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None of them being any different too the other in terms of how the language was spoken.
to
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Meanwhile, somewhere in dark castle..
If it's no dark castle in particular, it's "in a dark". Should it be a specific dark castle, it's "in the dark".
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All that he could remember his something about danger
was
The story, yes, the story. It's fairly enjoyable to read, though I find Rayne's motives a bit vague right now.
I'm sure you have got that worked out for yourself and how you will incorporate that into your story.
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