Maegwyn
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Conspiracy Corner: Magic
By Cow Face
[Note: This is based on a suggestion by Lord Asrius.]
While scanning through the list of suggestions for articles for the Zardian, one in particular caught my attention: What is the origin of magic in Lore? This would be the appropriate occasion to coolly analyze the facts and release a well-thought report on the phenomenon. However, it is far easier to produce silly rhetoric, so this is obviously the better path. As you can see, rhetoric is a celebrated part of all of my articles. Many of my esteemed colleagues have produced reports based on magic. Elnaith discussed the magic taught to us by our parents. Stormfyre penned an article on superpowers. Magic is often involved in the Museum of Lore, and there are many more examples available in the Zardian. Now, I would never attempt to refute any of my colleagues (except those that disagree with me), as I feel that they all have an excellent grasp of the situation. However, I feel that Dr. Rimblade has hit the nail on its head, with his evidence that magic is evil. That's right, folks. Magic is evil!
My opening case for this statement can be proven by examining the origins of magic. However, as I lack the patience to research it, I will instead lay out my theory for how this mystical energy came to be on Lore. It began like this: Many years ago, the goddess Lorithia formed the world of Lore. Then, she produced many others to further shape the face of Lore. The name for these ... demigods ... is unknown, though it is possible that they are called Administrators. The Administrators then began producing the creatures and people of Lore. However, there were some problems: how would all of these beasts live in harmony until they saw an Adventurer? Naturally, an answer presented itself to the Administrators - magic! After all, it can be used to explain everything else, such as why an identification card for Necropolis U. students can be expired, but still legitimate. Thus did they bring the force of magic into being.
It could be argued that while magic is a driving force in the world of AdventureQuest and DragonFable, it is not present in MechQuest. However, I must beg to differ, as this means that there is room for me to be incorrect, which we all know is impossible. After all, deus ex machina is quite apparent in the world of MechQuest, set a mere 4,995 years before DragonFable. This can explain many odd occurrences in the town of Soluna City. How do ghosts possess mecha? Magic! How are our mecha always recovered, no matter how damaged they are? Magic! What powers the RuneHawks' mecha's weapons? Magic! Obviously, magic - or mana, as it is often called - is as important to denizens of MechQuest's Lore as to those of AdventureQuest or DragonFable's Lore.
You may wonder what makes magic so evil. After all, it seems as though magic is a pivotal part of the multiverse that is Lore. That is absolutely true; however, it would not make a very good conspiracy theory to say that it was not evil. Do not fear, though! As always, I have proof to back up these seemingly inane claims. Though magic can be used to explain many of the important positive phenomena on Lore, it can also be linked to the dark art of Necromancy. While I find nothing wrong with this practice - I think Necromancers probably just want to make their own friends - many do. After all, they have been given a bad name, just because they are the cause of many of the nasty creatures on Lore. Furthermore, magic is likely the culprit of the many wars between the races of Lore - it has driven them out of their senses. Of course, many benevolent figures are patrons of the art of magic, such as Xan the Pyromancer. While many call him mad, he is just as sane as I am.
In addition, magic forms many of the weapons of destruction used by Adventurers (and more) around Lore. This, of course, is a wonderful thing, but it has been misused at times. An example of the misuse of magical weapons is that while many of the notables of Lore are given ultimate weapons, they are denied to the ones that really need them: Adventurers that wish only to bash unsuspecting Frogzards with them.
This leads me to another example of magical mishaps: Zards. While some breeds of Zard - such as the esteemed CowZard - are quite snuggable, other types are less so. For example, who would wish to give a big hug to a SkellyZard? Obviously, these creatures are a menace to all who wish to snuggle, and must be destroyed. Luckily for us, the mighty Frogzard Hunter is always ready to attack these creatures without need for little things like cause.
Magic used to play an important part in Lorian politics. Early elections for ruler were decided by a contest of magic: Whomever could make the others say "Ow" most was the ruler. This is similar to the Golden Rule: They that have the gold make the rules. However, despite the fact that this was a very efficient way to decide who got to have the Conch of Leadership, it led to much political strife, especially along party lines of Zard and Anti-Zard. The concept was abandoned in recent years, though it is still one of the myriad ways by which eZine writers decide superiority, and thereby who gets to eat first.
Oh, and you can register as a member of the Anti-Zard party at any time during the year. Forms are available in Yulgar's Inn, behind the locked door marked 42. Bring a torch, as you might find that the stairs are missing. Goodbye for now, and good luck to all of my fellow conspiracy-hunters!
P.S.: It is interesting to note that according to some texts, the Hebrews once witnessed food raining down from the sky. They called this food manna, a word meaning "What is it?"
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