(DF) A Present of Valor


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(DF) A Present of Valor

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11/24/2010 0:08:50

Age100
Member

Wow, my first story here. I decided for my first one to be a light, easy story you could read for fun. Here's the first one, Clickie Tell me what you think of it, and I know rating isn't allowed here, but could you guys tell me what level of writing this is around, like a grade level, 3rd grade work, 7th grade work, etc., so I can tell what my current level is?

< Message edited by Age100 -- 11/24/2010 22:13:06 >

Post #: 1

11/25/2010 5:04:09

demolitiondragon
Constructively Friendly!

Could I suggest leaving an extra line between each paragraph to break it up?

Like this.

It just makes it easier to read.

The story hasn't really gone far enough for me to comment on yet other than that.

"butted the glass" instead of "butt the glass" btw.

Post #: 2

11/26/2010 1:24:58

Age100
Member

Alright. I entered tabs first of all, but it seems that they don't translate...

Alright, the second part is up :D Enjoy.

< Message edited by Age100 -- 11/27/2010 0:10:55 >

Post #: 3

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