PD
Member
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So you guys probably want something to make yourselves be happy from all the seriousness that's going on. Let's begin.
1. Your character never eats, sleeps, nor goes to the bathroom.
2. Nobody has parents. I don't see anyone's mom's calling their daughter or son while in battle. You should really try to associate with them more...
3. War kill systems are actually totally free. Why you're still paying to use them is beyond me. (Matrix lol?)
4. You are automatically immortal. You never seem to age.
5. You should really thank your pack mule, Pooky Pooky, more often. How else are you able to carry all those rares around.
6. Nobody ever hires George Lowe as a mercenary.
7. Pomeranians don't exist in Epicduel. That's why Daimyo isn't around.
8. We all demand answers on how Charfade just *magically* grew 5 feet. But then again, doing so would probably destroy the space-time continuum.
8.5. Or we can just use quantum physics to explain that...
9. Everyone you see is most likely capable of beating you to a soft pulp.
10. As to why nobody's thought of temporarily stealing weapons during battle confuses me. Can't do Bezerk without a primary weapon.
11. Your Zookas and Guns run out of ammo when you start thinking about your ammo.
12. All the weapons are shiny yet the entire environment is extremely dirty. Guess everyone wants to have shiny/cool looking things rather than clean the place up.
13. Nobody ever screams in pain when they get damaged. You can't hear them anyways.
14. We've evolved enough to be able to talk telepathically. That's why nobody opens nor moves their mouths while talking.
15. Nobody ever uses Bludgeon above level 1 pragmatically.
16. Don't look now. There's a Shadow Guard hiding in the corner.
17. The best Epicduel Builds and strategies works well until .00000000000000000000000001 seconds into the battle. After that, you're either toast, or you're miraculously still alive.
18. Turns? Why are we taking turns? I wanna Surgical Strike you AND heal myself at the same time! D:<
19. Nobody realizes it, but Baelius is watching you. Even when you're.... oh wait... I forgot about rule 1.
20. Everyone who uses Desert Cyborg Armor has interchangeable limbs. You are 90% Robot after all.
20.1. Wait a minute... if you're using the desert cyborg armor, then how do you...
20.2. *Random guy comes up and shoots PD* ,"So many questions you don't need to know the answers for..."
21. You want to know the reason you're still paying just to re-color your fancy helm? You just throw away your old helm for the same helm. Just in pink. Quit wasting valuable resources you. >:(
22. Be glad Fame IS called Fame. Just imagine what would happen if it were called something else...
23. Christmas isn't about sharing or human empathy anymore. It's now about beating each other up with your powerful Christmas Rares! (I certainly don't want to be around for that)
24. WAT. WAT DO YOU MEAN I CANT GET A FULL REFUND ON THIS STAFF IM YOUR BEST CUSTOMER ITS JUST SLIGHTLY USED! D: (Totally did not use it as a fishing rod)
24.1. I knew I should've bought the warranty...
24.2. That's why nobody gets a full refund in the first place. We keep forgetting to buy a warranty with every purchase.
25. You know why everything's so expensive? The Answer; There's no Wal-Mart to make everything cheap. And even if there were one, it would just be called Epic-Mart, or Duel-Mart. "Save Money. Kill Better. Duel-Mart."
I'll add more as time goes on. Feel free to make your own funnies. But don't try to include them into mine. It'll get all confusing and get hard to keep track of after that.
< Message edited by PD -- 7/21/2011 20:55:47 >
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