ChaosRipjaw
How We Roll Winner Jun15
|
So, even without balancing, this character runs into copyright issues. I understand that you state it's inspired from Control, but every single move here is an exact copy of a move the protagonist, Jesse Faden, in the games uses - and the CB-32 is a pretty close parallel to her gun as well. The RP forum rules states: quote:
Originality does create interesting twists and turns, and we try to accommodate your imagination. This in mind, keep your plot lines and references as original as possible. The use of copyrighted material outside of AE games is not allowed on these boards. Inspiration can strike from any source, but copyright infringement will have serious consequences. In this case, you may create a new character that pulls from one or two similar ability concepts and then enhance them with you own unique twists/abilities/weapons, but this character by itself is too close to Jesse Faden to be considered a unique creation at this time. For some general feedback with how the abilities are structured, the current recharge for Kinetic Energy is way too fast. I've recommended that people consider using Dungeons & Dragons timing when shaping abilities - which allows for one major action and 1-2 minor actions within 6 seconds. This character can fully recharge from zero energy in 8 seconds. At the absolute fastest, you shouldn't be recovering anything more than a third of your energy per post (meaning 2 bars every 6 seconds), and I would likely decrease this further given the strength of abilities. If you want a good example of a sliding recharge scale, check out Kellehndros's 2020 WPC character, Ebriva. If you have specific questions about abilities you may voice them either here or in the Discord channel, but this character as written is not allowed. Source Setting: Mechquest (sort of) Name: Defyance Monikage, aka "Support from the Shadows" Age Range: 20s-30s Race (Pure or halfbreed only): Human Element: Wind Appearance (Build, hair, skin, clothes...): Graceful and willowy, with flowing wavy hair the color of light mauve streaked with black, and pleasant, beautiful features that can transition from soft and kind to hard and unforgiving in an instant. No one knows why she wears glasses, it's not like she actually needs them, though they do serve to accentuate rather than detract from her beauty. She wears a blazer with form-fitting jeans and heeled boots. Over this attire, she wears a fashionable white long coat suited for lab work, protection from the rain, and some protection from swords and bullets. Belongings and Equipment: CB-32: The CB-32, or the Cubetech pistol, is Defyance's primary weapon. "After a raid on the Toxicity, aided by four bounty hunters from the guild [NAMES REDACTED], the [REDACTED] Project obtained the blueprints to the Cyborg Knights' Cubetech. Cubetech is an incredible innovation that allows for quick manufacture, modification, and repair of weapons and armor, using pieces of 'cubes' and simply attaching them together." --- Log 3 Section 2 As a Cubetech weapon, it has an odd, abstract design, resembling many cubes held together by an unknown force. It seems to be constantly assembling and reassembling itself when not in a direct line of sight. The pistol is indestructible, although its light weight makes it impracticable as a melee weapon. If it were to be knocked out of Defyance's hand, it will dematerialize temporarily and rematerialize again shortly, still in her hand. The pistol holds 12 rounds and would be considered a semi-automatic pistol. The pistol does not use physical ammunition in the traditional sense. Instead of reloading once all the bullets are used up, Defyance must wait for about 3 seconds before the pistol rapidly regenerates its ammo. The bullets are of an unknown material, poetically referred to as "pure wind," which travel about as fast as a baseball pitch (45 m/s, or 100 mph). Gunshot wounds from the CB-32 are similar to those of hollow-point bullets, although no debris is left behind in said wound. Bullets that go through things penetrate armor, but do less damage. Conversely, bullets that do not go through things expand and do more damage, but are more easily stopped by armor. A hollow point bullet is designed to "flatten" on impact and the energy will be transferred quickly once it hits the target. --- Reddit Skills, spells and abilities: General physical stats: Defyance isn't exactly the most athletic person in the world, preferring to use tools and her mind rather than brute force. However, she has remarkably high endurance, allowing her to keep pace with and continually nip at the heels of extraordinarily strong foes until they collapse. She has had proficient small arms training, particularly with pistols and knives. She is an excellent shot, though not supernaturally so compared to master marksmen such as Sariel Shadowlight, being able to reliably place shots around the bullseye of a target. Deathless Mountain Kinetic Module: As part of Project [REDACTED], the Deathless Mountain Kinetic Module simulates the abilities of Rukan Shikura's supernatural Mark. Using any of the Kinetic Module's abilities consumes energy, which is constantly regenerated. Different abilities and their usages consume varying amounts of energy, which limits the number of actions Defyance can take with the Kinetic Module. The energy reserve of the Kinetic Module is quantifiable and is known instinctively to the user of the Module. When viewed by a tech support using Yulan's Eye of Vigilance or other HUD interfaces, it is visually represented by a bar exactly 8 inches long. Use of the energy is consumed in sections of this bar. The energy bar regenerates linearly at a rate of 2 inches per second. The energy bar does not start regenerating until a use of an ability has concluded. The Kinetic Module provides the following ablities. ---Dash---: Modelled after the "Reduced Earth" aspect of the Mark, Dash introduces a brief burst of speed, strong enough that the displacement of air creates a temporary vacuum. The distance covered by Dash is about 5 feet. If there is an obstacle obstructing her path of movement, the force of the ability can blast through said obstacle. If such an obstacle cannot be destroyed, Dash simply stops abruptly in front of it. Dashing into opponents can knock them back but is not recommended. A single Dash consumes 1 inch of energy. ---Levitation---: Modelled after the "Heaven" aspect of the Mark. For about half a minute, Defyance can float off the ground to an elevation at about the second floor of a house, with respect to her launching point. She can manually control her elevation during this time frame, although she cannot exceed the height limit. Once this time limit has passed, she will slowly but steadily drift back down to the ground. While levitating, she drifts at walking speed and must rely on the Dash ability to maneuver quickly. Most notably, unlike the other abilities, Levitation does not consume energy, but rather is limited only by the time. ---Grip---: Modelled after the "Heaven" aspect of the Mark. It is an extremely rudimentary form of telekinesis, allowing her to pull objects toward her and then launch them at high speeds. She can only hold and launch one object at a time, although she can do so in rapid succession, as long as she has enough energy reserves. Heavy and large objects require more energy, and similarly, are launched at slower speeds. While "holding" an object, it floats near her hand, allowing her to grip excessively large and heavy objects. Holding an object will not allow her energy to regenerate. The ability is somewhat unstable. If she tries to use the Grip to pull something very large toward her (like the support beam of a room), it will just rip off a small chunk instead. It is also quite inaccurate, as she cannot precisely target objects, i.e. she cannot disarm opponents as the Grip field will attempt to grab the entire opponent. It appears the smallest object it can grip must be at least palm sized (i.e. smartphone, grenade, etc.) The ability can only grab nonliving, solid things. She can snatch a rocket out of midair to launch back, but cannot stop a pure fireball. A single Grip consumes 1/2 inch of energy for the smallest sized object, and linearly grows bigger as mass increases. A single Grip for something with the mass or size of a generator would consume about 2.5 inches. Energy is not consumed by the launch. ---Grip - Palm---: At this point in her life, Defyance is still training in qigong basics, so she makes use of this ability to supplement. In close quarters combat, she can deal powerful, concussive blows with her palm. This ability consumes 1/2 inch of energy per use. ---Grip - Shield---: The Kinetic Module levitates many small chunks of the ground or nearby debris to form a rudimentary shield around her. It is useful for blocking projectiles, but not so much for melee attacks. As long as her shield is up, her energy reserves will not regenerate, and her mobility is limited to the ground; in addition, she cannot return fire or use any other powers without dropping the shield, restricting its usefulness to allowing her to get to cover. This ability consumes 1.5 inches of energy per use. Personality: Shy and reserved in social situations, but cold and deadly serious on the field. She does not believe in excessive force, and will be unlikely to finish off a downed opponent. History (optional): In modern times, Defyance Monikage is primarily Rukan Shikura's mysterious partner and trusted backup in Operation Nightfighter alongside her best friend Sapphire Slipstream, although she has been known to provide support for operatives such as Dao Yulan and Vasily Jarishnikov. Although she usually sits in tech support in the background, she is a capable field operative who has undertaken many dangerous missions on her own. Design notes: Inspired directly by Remedy's Control.
< Message edited by Starflame13 -- 3/14/2020 17:10:16 >
|