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7/24/2024 23:26:52   
  Starflame13
Moderator


3 full days to get new bios in! Let's make sure we hit 10, people!


@Anastira - On the whole, I think the changes refocus Epithet to let you center your focus on your writing. Both Alarm Person and Minor Elusion still will require heavy collaboration to avoid bunnying, but aren't inherently doing so by the ability themselves.

That said, with the majority of the abilities occurring at greater than 10 feet in range - with the exception of Minor Elusioni with its built in panic attack - there is nothing stopping Epithet from rattling off Insults non-stop. Alarm Person and Infect Thoughts are both good in that repeated uses weaken, but if she is constantly hurling lies, the odds of one slipping through the defenses are quite high. Since Epithet does not have stamina or rely on mana, I'd like to suggest that using insults non-stop should strain her voice; she can use a few in quick succession, but if she doesn't rest a bit between groupings or after a longer soliloquy, her voice should weaken and thus have the words be less powerful. You are welcome to suggest a different method to prevent non-stop Insults! Let me know if you want to discuss, and looking forward to seeing the next round!
AQ DF MQ AQW  Post #: 26
7/26/2024 15:00:48   
Oddball
Member

Round 2! Revisions are made in Bold and additions are Underlined!

“Leave the paperwork to the ones with desk jobs, I’ll be out here doing our damn job.”



Name: Olivier Haith
Alias: “Veteran Officer Haith” “The Bureau’s Golden Shot.”
Age: Early-mid 30’s
Race: Modified Human
Element: Energy

Appearance:Olivier stands at roughly 5’6” with dark Red hair with navy Blue highlights. While resting, Olivier’s eyes are a dark Green, but when her pistol is charged they crackle with purple lightning.

Even while off-duty, Olivier wears her security vest at all times. Underneath her security vest, Olivier wears a padded jacket dyed in black and blue, with a white shirt barely poking out through the bottom. She wears a pair of baggy, padded pants that are fitted with flexible metal plates at the knees.


Abilities

Body Modifications: As a member of the Public Safety Bureau, Olivier underwent a series of surgeries to help her combat the growing threat to her city, with the main focus on allowing her to move at speeds unreachable by normal humans.

Her physical strength does fall behind the rest of her peers, but she is still comparable to those at peak condition.

While she can move incredibly quickly, she can only do so in short bursts if she doesn’t want to risk overloading her senses and passing out. She can cover roughly about 25 feet in a second while pushing herself, and can only do so once every 6 seconds. While travelling like this, she is followed by a streak of lightning that, while looking dangerous, does not interact with the world around it in any way.

Lightning Wielding: While not in the forefront like her speed enhancements, the other major change to Olivier’s body was the ability to conduct, and channel, lightning through her body. While lightning from other sources have little-to-no effect on her, Olivier is only capable of controlling her own created lightning.

As she fights, Olivier naturally creates electricity. The process is slow, taking seconds of being in combat before her lightning starts to visibly appear.

Olivier has no way of naturally discharging electricity, and relies on it solely for charging her weapons. As such, if she doesn’t regularly charge her weapons, she runs the risk of accumulating too much electricity and would cause massive, internal, damage.

Equipment

Standard-Duty Security Vest - The vest that Olivier wears is enforced with various strengthening enhancements, and has taken its fair share of heavy blows and explosions over her last 10 years as an officer. The vest is capable of absorbing a large amount of force, while the padded clothing underneath helps soften the rest of the blow. Together, these simple tools provide Olivier with a staggeringly powerful defence.

While her defensive capabilities are powerful, Olivier is still only human, and is bound to the limits of what humans can do. As such, she can only take so much damage before her body starts to give out on her.

T4S3R Mark IV - Conduit: The name of the pistol that Olivier carries with her. This weapon is specifically designed to be able to draw in the electricity that Olivier naturally creates over time, and uses it to charge itself. While drawn, Olivier can channel an amount of electricity through the pistol to have it gain one charge. The pistol can hold up to 6 charges, and firing the weapon expends one. If the last charge is expended, Olivier has to wait a few moments before beginning to charge the weapon again, as doing so too early will run the risk of the weapon malfunctioning. When fired, the weapon fires an orb of warbling electricity at high speeds. While the shot has little-to-no impact, it does send a heavy shock rippling through its target.

Modified Stun Baton - A baton that doubles as a lightningrod. Any excess lightning that Olivier would create is stored inside of the baton. At the press of a button, the baton sheathes itself in a coat of lightning. The effect of this lasts until Olivier has managed to strike a surface five times. After which, she is required to wait a moment before the baton can store electricity again.

Voltage Grenades: A set of triplet grenades that hang off of Olivier’s waist. By channelling a small amount of electricity into a held grenade, Olivier can store a charge of energy inside of it. Each grenade can hold up to a maximum of two charges, and each charge increases the effects of the thrown grenade. Olivier is capable of throwing these grenades up to 40 feet away, and the range of the explosive effect ranges depending on the amount of charges the grenades hold. Olivier also has to wait a small amount of time between each charge, otherwise she will overload herself and become lethargic for a brief amount of time.

Without any charge, the grenade has very little impact, and would do nothing more than release a pulse of static. The radius of this only affects the exact location the grenade lands.

With one charge, the grenade is capable of disorientating more agile opponents, while still not having too much of an effect on larger enemies. The explosion of this grenade affects a 5 feet radius around the location the grenade lands.

At two charges, the grenade’s pulse is capable of interrupting other electronics for just a second, while also disorientating larger foes and paralysing smaller foes for a second. The explosion of this grenade affects a 10 foot radius around the location the grenade lands. Fully charged grenades are also volatile, and Olivier cannot hold a fully charged grenade for very long before it begins to cause her hand to spasm.
AQ DF AQW Epic  Post #: 27
7/26/2024 17:35:55   
Anastira
Member

As always, changes are in bold.

Name / Title
Epithet (noun, an adjective or descriptive phrase expressing a quality characteristic of the person or thing mentioned)
occasionally “Pithy”

Element
Energy (example: Did you see that girl? She has such toxic energy / Sweet kid, but so full of energy! )

Age Range
400 years

Race
Fey

Appearance (Build, hair, skin, clothes, etc.)
Epithet appears childlike (late teens or early twenties at first glance) and yet also ageless. As a fey, no one knows her age, but she is solidly an adult. She is scrawny and about five feet tall, with cold slate-gray eyes, skin so translucent one can see the bluish veins beneath, and ragged hair cut evenly at her waist. Her teeth are sharpened - not enough to be a weapon, but enough to enhance the inherent nastiness of her entire aesthetic - and she wears an eternal twisted smirk on her grossly pale lips. Her hands are bony and haggard, with nails grown so long they resemble claws in terms of their length. She wears a black cowl and simple robe, and walks barefoot on filthy feet. She likes to shorten her name to “Pithy”, though it seems only she enjoys the irony of this name.


Equipment (Armor, Weapons, etc.)
Epithet can use either of her weapons to deliver an Insult as defined under the Skills, Spells, & Special Abilities section. The Insult may only be delivered in this way if, and when, her blade manages to connect with the victim’s flesh. If the blade is parried, she can only attempt to deliver the Insult verbally, if she is not silenced. Epithet’s weapons are twin shortblades shaped like sickles; both blades are limned with the light of words scrolling across the blades, like an ethereal veil of insults. If one looks closely enough , they might notice that the words there seem to be advice and criticism given to Epithet some time ago; the things they read seem to have been intended for a child or a student.

Unwanted Advice
Colored black with smoldering edges of red, Unwanted Advice is the larger of the two, slightly heavier and heftier - though not by much. The words scrolling across its blade are bold and red; they are almost easy to read.

”Constructive” Criticism
Sculpted in the colors of the moon - egg-white and silver-blue with a tinge of yellow - “Constructive” Criticism is slightly smaller and lighter than its twin, appearing friendlier at first glance; however, its blade is also the sharper of the two. The words scrolling across its blade are violet-blue, and they seem to flicker and glitch if one watches them closely. However, once in a while the words suddenly turn bold for an instant, shining a cruel silvery hue.


Insults: Skills, Spells, & Special Abilities
All of Epithet’s magical abilities are used via Epithet delivering an Insult verbally; if she is silenced, the only way she may attempt any of these is via channeling them mentally through her weapons in the instant the weapon makes physical contact with flesh. To deliver an Insult, she must be within line-of-sight and clear earshot of the victim, or have her weapons physically touching the victim’s flesh; all Insults are single-target only, and if they affect anyone other than Epithet herself, they are additionally limited by a physical range as described below. If an Insult targets only Epithet herself, she may forgo the verbal component if she is holding at least one of her swords, as hilt-to-flesh is a worthy substitute to blade-to-flesh when applied to herself.

Once given, Insults are not sure to succeed; certainly, an Insult that is not well-worded nor well-aimed may fall on deaf ears, and a victim with enough self-confidence may shake off the effects of an Insult without so much as flinching. Each time a weapon touches flesh, Epithet can attempt to deliver an Insult; that is, if she strikes twice in quick succession, she can attempt to deliver two Insults, so long as neither Insult is too long to be delivered in that time frame (for example, Infect Thoughts).

Additionally, Insults require both mental/emotional energy to be delivered and will also strain Epithet’s vocal chords over time. If she attempts to deliver too many Insults continuously, or too long of an Insult, her Insults will weaken in intensity and effectiveness, forcing her to take a pause and recharge. Good Insults require passionate inspiration and a strong voice!

Despise Self
Epithet capitalizes on her victim’s insecurities, causing them to feel sudden and biting emotional pain. The crueler and more true the Insult, the deeper the Insult will hurt. This is Epithet’s favorite Insult; nothing gives her joy in quite the same way as a well-delivered Insult cutting so deep and true that she can physically watch the pain flash across the eyes of her victim. This Insult can only be delivered when the victim is within 20 feet of Epithet.

Infect Thoughts
In a sudden burst of inspiration, Epithet gives a short speech which is so insulting in nature it may cause the victim to be disoriented for as long as the speech is given and Epithet continues to deliver a coherent, sufficiently insulting soliloquy; the victim may also break free by mentally “shaking” themselves free of the effect. This speech requires Epithet to be within 10 feet of the victim; however, if Epithet attempts to use this ability repeatedly, it will be subsequently easier and easier for a previously-”infected” opponent to break free…the game is up, Epithet!

Minor Elusion
(Affects self only.) Epithet reverse-gaslights herself into believing she is wrong about her opponents’ next move. Epithet directs this gaslighting inwardly, at herself, which causes her to change her next movement, causing her to be an unpredictable combatant - for better or worse. For example, Epithet might stupidly step into an obvious swing of a sword, sustaining a heavy blow; or she might miraculously parry a hit which no one could have seen coming. Successful gaslighting makes Epithet begin to spiral into an existential crisis; with each successful use - that is, one that results in a positive result - Epithet veers closer and closer to a full-on panic attack: she begins to feel lightheaded, her chest feels tight and she begins to hyperventilate. Epithet is uncomfortable with the fact that she can successfully gaslight herself the same as she can gaslight her victims; turns out Epithet can dish it out…but she can’t take it! Additionally, good Insults rely on confidence in their delivery; if Epithet is overtaken by her panic attack, the Insults will cease to flow; and she will be a very bad combatant indeed.

Spare the Lying
(Affects self only.) If Epithet is severely wounded, she may tell a Lie to bolster her constitution and stay in the fight a little longer. This may heal the pain - but not the physical wound - of one injury, allowing her to believe in her Lie and ignore the pain for a time. However, she can only tell a Lie three times before even she is forced to face the truth.

Alarm Person
If Epithet is being attacked: Epithet hurls a brazen lie at her victim in an attempt to cause unfounded fear. If this ability is successful, she will be better able to guess at what her victim’s intentions are: she has a better idea whether her opponent is on the offensive or defensive, giving her a better chance of reacting appropriately. However, with repeated successful Insults against the same target, the victim will become less and less easily offended by this Insult, causing the chance of success to lower significantly. This ability also requires the victim to be within 10 feet of Epithet. This ability may be used to temporarily break the concentration of her assailant, if applicable.


Personality / Backstory (Optional)
I despise you…because I despise myself.
AQW  Post #: 28
7/27/2024 0:02:14   
  Starflame13
Moderator


Moving in to our final day for bios! Remember, we're looking for 10 minimum to run the ECs in their standard format.


@Oddball - Olivier reads much easier to work with now, and I think we got the added clarity where we needed it! I reached out to confirm that the intent of the Stun Baton is localized, so minor shocks/numbness to the area struck rather than a tazer or something that will conduct through armor. With that caveat noted, approved!


@Anastira - I think that was the last tweak we needed for Epithet! Approved!
AQ DF MQ AQW  Post #: 29
7/27/2024 4:54:33   
Starstruck
Member

Name: Deandra Vill
Element: Darkness
Age Range: Who's asking? Where is your supervisor young man? (Appears 56, probably older than that! Ew!)
Race: Human? DEMON

Appearance: Stout, frumpy, and bleach-blonde, with a permanent scowl and cloudy gray eyes hidden behind large dark sunglasses, Deandra is the picture-perfect image of a disgruntled and vexatious widow with absolutely nothing better to do than get up in everybody's business. Though she is short, she wears high stiletto heels that are too small for her feet, but still manages to walk around with nary a wobble. A string of black pearls dangles on the mottled and liver-spotted flesh of her collarbone, the dull luster coated with a thick layer of dust. It's almost a trick of the light, but something seems to move inside them every so often. Her dress is unflattering, gauzy, and black, with layers of tulle and other light but scratchy fabrics draped haphazardly over her oddly-shaped body. She moves with an odd sense of grace, with a little bit too much movement. Pinned to her left lapel is a black rose, and each of her hems and sleeves is lined with a fine, tattered white lace.

Dust seems to follow Deandra around, and it coats everything about her from her tongue to her hair. It's not hard to follow her trail - dandruff, sand, and pollen settle on surfaces near her, tickling your nose and throat and casting an unsightly pall over her and everything around her. If you look closely, you can see long, squiggly white hairs randomly scattered across the surface of her clothing. Gross!

Skills, Spells, Abilities: Deandra is, on top of being a metaphorical demon from metaphorical hell, a literal demon from actual Hell. This is a twist that nobody ever sees coming! On top of having decently enhanced strength and stamina, she is well-versed in contract and HOA law. Those who break the rules may find themselves with a few strings attached.

The way Deandra's magic works is extremely simple. NOT! Upon making eye contact with the demon, you enter a very simple contract with her - something you may not visually see, but will feel inside your soul for less than a second before you are left with a shiver down your spine. Nothing deadly or dangerous, no souls involved, but you are granted resistance to her hellish powers so long as you follow the following rules:

1. You must speak only truth to Deandra.
2. You must use polite and formal language when speaking to Deandra - and absolutely no vulgarities!
3. You must state your full name when Deandra asks for it.

The more...*sinfully succulent* victims- er, participants have one additional clause added to their contract. The noble, righteous, and pure? Well, it's always Deandra's desire to corrupt an innocent soul, but their joie de vivre is repugnant to a demon's lifeless gaze. So long as they obey the three basic rules, they shan't fear the dark. A little coal-black vestigial heart that's forgotten what it's for, pumping oil-slick tar through the veins of a FILTHY little sinner? Well, that's a rotten black plum far too overripe to remain on the tree, and must fall when shaken down.

The additional clauses vary based on the individual, and are always perfectly tailored to take advantage of their particular fatal flaw. A serial philanderer may be compelled to make eye contact with the demon when speaking or listening, lest his eyes wander in a manner that is less than chaste. An assassin for hire may be required to hold her dagger up to her own throat while speaking, lest she fail to understand her purpose in the cruel game of life and death. The purpose of these contracts is, of course, not to help prevent sin. Hells no! It's to prey on those moments of weakness where you simply can't help yourself from taking a little taste of the indulgent and impure.

Break a rule, and Deandra will add a new subclause to your contract that could range from the poetic (Everything you say to Deandra must rhyme) to the mundane (you can only attack Deandra with your fists and not your weapons) to the stupid (a tiny imp appears on your shoulder who narrates your every move in a really boring voice). Break too many rules, and your soul could be on the line. Better behave yourself!

Deandra doesn't *just* make negative contracts with rules that hold you back...she can also encourage your worst impulses by providing a visible trail of bread crumbs that turn your bad choices into good ones. Just sign here, and one of her incredibly nefarious powers will be all yours, for a teensy little price of course! Each of Deandra's magical spells and abilities can be conferred upon a willing vessel through the signing of an infernal contract. These don't punish you for sinning...quite the opposite, in fact. Each malefic action you undertake (the nature of which specified by the contract) amplifies Deandra's powers a little bit more. And what's hers is yours, so everyone benefits! Except for maybe that blind orphan you kicked into that well. Deandra may only confer ONE of her many amazing powers onto any "ally," and only ONE individual may receive any of her boons at any given moment. Once either party has had their fill, the contract is nixed and you are free to live with the consequences of your horrible actions, you monster. While the contract is active, Deandra is significantly more resistant to assault from the licensee currently using her powers, and she has absolute immunity against her OWN powers.

I WANT TO SEE YOUR MANAGER - Deandra unfurls hidden silken wings that can beat the air with tremendous power, though they are quite heavy and can only sustain flight for short periods of time. The wings grow in size, power, speed, and durability through evil deeds. And they're really sticky but also dusty at the same time, which is 100% gross.

SEWING CIRCLE - Deandra always carries her knitting around with her. Yarn or string of any color or material, patterned into dastardly shapes, becomes incredibly durable for as long as she can muster up the demonic energy and ill-will to keep it that way. While she carries a small supply of it on her person, she can also resourcefully use found materials if there's anything useful about. With many misdeeds from her partners in crime, she can maintain the enchantment for longer. It is difficult for her to fully bind righteous souls, but her power makes the threads difficult to cleave regardless of how many puppies you've rescued from burning buildings.

DON'T YOU KNOW WHO I AM? - A burst of Hellish flames gather up and then flare out from Deandra's eyes, scorching anything in the way with black fire. This soulfire is unlike normal fire - it carries no true heat, and is only capable of inflicting burning pain. It takes some time and effort to coax this roaring flame from the embers of what passes for a heart in Deandra's chest, but the intensity and frequency of the flame is increased with a more powerful contract. Its power is weaker on good little boys and girls who follow the rules, but the naughty may find their torment to be well-earned.

VEXATIOUS LITIGATION - A sharp bite from Deandra's fangs is more than a mere wound. Her toxic venom causes your very flesh to wither, weakening your strength and life force. With enough of it in your system, it could cause serious issues indeed. Holding fast to the terms of your contract is your only hope to stop or reverse the spread of the poison. She may also gather up the bile within her mouth to spit noxious acid a short distance. Again, grows in power, yada yada yada. Whatever. We get it by now.

KARAOKE NIGHT - Deandra is a great singer...said nobody, ever, except for Deandra herself. Her rendition of "Living on a Prayer" is an absolutely unforgettable listening experience. What she lacks in pitch control she makes up for in volume. There's not much actual dark magic in this one, it's just REALLY loud and REALLY annoying. And if you're engaged in a more advanced-level contract with Deandra, you DO get a psychic echo of this in your head, offset by a second or two and with just a slight hint of microphone feedback. The righteous don't have much defense against this, but maybe she'll be less mad if you clap politely and pretend it was good.

SPA DAY - Deandra's fingernails with their glittery black nail polish can twist into long dark talons. The gashes left behind by these claws don't heal well, and bleed readily even on the most stalwart and righteous of paragons. As it so happens, this power has been promised as a boon to one lucky little boy who shall currently remain nameless, so it's unfortunately off-limits to any competitors foolish enough to envision themselves in league with a demon.

All in all, Deandra is pretty powerful! You'd better stay on her good side...or maybe her evil side. Hee hee!

For Starflame:
spoiler:

Clarifications here! I am one step ahead of you!

-=- Deandra's powers are not very strong unless she's managed to swindle one or more of the other competitors into making a deal with her for power. Whichever boon they choose to receive from her will be gassed up by a small amount, cumulatively adding to itself with each misdeed.
-=- It's a lot less vague than it sounds. As part of the preparation for this character, I've gone through everyone else's bio and tabulated what kind of contract Deandra wants to offer them, as well as what (incredibly minor) restriction - if any - would be placed on their interactions. Whoever I'm in the arena with, I'll contact them suggesting the restriction and offer them the chance to adjust or reject it. If someone doesn't think they belong on the Naughty list, I'm not going to force the issue! It's all just for fun anyhow.
-=- No I will not be specific for her spells. OK fine, you wore me down. She only gets a few seconds for flight or enchanted threads, and the pain from darkfire is a 6 second ordeal because 3 seconds just isn't long enough. The poisons last for a minute or so at minimum. The screaming is just regular screaming.
-=- OK it's not JUST regular screaming. It's magically amplified in volume, and she can also use the spell to add special effects to any kind of speech or just create sounds in general. She can speak telepathically as well. But wouldn't it be just the funniest thing if she has all these demon spells and then this one is just her scream-singing Bon Jovi until she's hoarse?
-=- Every single ability or spell needs to recharge between uses, including the wings and claws. The recharge time is arbitrary and random, but significant. This restriction also applies to powers used by her food- I mean, friends, but their abilities recharge independently of each other.
-=- Signatories intuitively understand their contract and cannot break it by accident. They will have a bad feeling about any acts they take that could violate the contract, and may even directly experience a voice that clearly states the line that they are about to violate and how their proposed action will constitute a violation. This doesn't stop most people from plowing ahead anyway. Free will, hey?
-=- You can actually get out of the initial contract, but it's a very obnoxious process that involves a lot of paperwork, so most people give up.
-=- Nothing in the contract prevents you from attacking or even killing Deandra, even if you're her prey- I mean, ally. She's a tough nut to crack, but she is painfully mortal. Ordinarily, sustaining lethal physical damage would just send her back to hell, but the EC arenas already know that little trick. She's also extra vulnerable to all kinds of anti-demon technology, even the dumb ones that don't sound like they work. Salt circles, cleric emblems, pentagrams, stuff like that.
DF MQ  Post #: 30
7/27/2024 12:29:17   
  Starflame13
Moderator


Dawn of the final day! As we get to later stages, I do tend to be a bit stricter with balancing as we have less time to work through potential changes.


@Starstruck - Glad to see you made it! Deandra is quite the character, but we have some work to go for balancing. As a start: while I appreciate you anticipating me asking you for clarity on the flavor of the abilities, please go ahead and pull those details into the abilities themselves, including specifying the race as Demon and putting any of the racial traits sprinkled throughout there. The flavor has me very excited to see her in the arena, but clarity is prioritized over personality in the bio phase.

Now, the abilities. Let's talk about contracts. A contract, by nature, requires consent from both parties to put into affect. They are not unilaterally binding. What you have detailed here is commands, rather than contracts. How you have these details is first overtly bunnying since characters have no option but to enter the contract, and second heavily leaning on meta-gaming since a character should not be able to read so much of another's personality to determine a fatal flaw in a single moment of eye contact. While contracts as a concept can be central to the core of the character, you are not going to have time to hash out litigation while in combat. If you want to carry this through for flavor of various abilities being gained through contracts, or have her forming them in other ways outside the event, that is fine, but this is not something that is practical for the Elemental Championships.

The one aspect of the contracts that could be worked in to combat that we have precedence for is ability sharing. In this case, it is Deandra bestowing the powers - and the recipient's full choice whether or not to use them, without penalty for declining. This does still require heavy collaboration, but it is workable with further limitations: namely, physical contact of some sort rather than simply eye contact, and only one power can be lent out at a time. My suggestion for Deandra is that she could temporarily bestow an ability to another character - and they instinctively know how to use it, and that doing so draws on demonic power. They have the next few seconds to decide to use it or not - Deandra cannot use that ability in that time frame. If they do choose to utilize it, then the next time Deandra makes use of the same ability, it has a slight power increase up until she lends out a different power. These should not be cumulative. If you want to maintain the resistance Deandra has to those using her powers, that is fine.

Now, looking at the specific abilities that Deandra can use: most need further clarity or limits in some manner. Sewing Circle is a clever way for Deandra to turn her cloths into armor, but let's limit this to knitting/cloth that she is in direct physical contact with, and one piece of knitting/clothing at a time. If she is using knitting to restrain a competitor, then she herself should be more vulnerable so that they have a chance to break free in that manner. Don't You Know How I Am also need a range limitation - no scorching people on the opposite side of the arena! Let's start with 15 feet as the standard, 30 feet while powered up. Vexatious Litigation is too powerful - especially tied to contracts for poison spread - so in removing the contracts mid-fight, this shifts to a localized poison of the bite area to wither/decay the skin without spreading, scaling up to weakening limbs for a few moments. A minute is a long time in the battle, so abilities that have significant impacts need to be shorter to reflect that. Lastly, Karaoke Night. With everything else that Deandra has going on, I would remove the telepathy - especially when the point of the ability is to be loud and heard by many. The Echo as a feature is really fun as well, but should only occur to those close enough to experience mic feedback - say, 10-20 feet.

If in balancing you choose to remove abilities to streamline the character, then we can discuss strengthening the remaining. Otherwise, let's shift the focus of the character to something that can work in fast-paced combat without controlling other character's outright. Once we have the abilities narrower and clarity in the right spots, we'll take a second look to see if balancing is needed. Looking forward to round 2!
AQ DF MQ AQW  Post #: 31
7/27/2024 12:36:37   
  Starflame13
Moderator


@Starstruck: One last note, since even I do miss things on occasion! "Don't You Know Who I Am" does teeter on the edge of the fire ability - since it's darkness causing burning pain, it's workable, but just wanted to confirm this is not actually intended to be physical fire or flames, but rather flickering shadows from hell so hot as to burn. Let me know if there was a different intention, and we can work to make sure it's in the bounds of Darkness.
AQ DF MQ AQW  Post #: 32
7/28/2024 10:31:50   
  Starflame13
Moderator


Good morning, everyone!

First of all, I want to thank everyone for their flexibility and positivity throughout the sign-ups process this year. We're having a bit of a rogue wave year - where all the minute oscillations of real life all happen to converge at one point to make quite a large disruption. Between health challenges, computer issues, school struggles, weddings, travels, literally moving to Australia... this is a busy year! Despite seeing as much if not more excitement for the event that we see ever year, I always do stress that real life comes first. We want people to have fun in the Championships, not to struggle to compete as they juggle writing with stressful events. As such, thank you again to everyone for showing your engagement, and I hope to see all who were interested but didn't have enough time to compete either show up more casually in the spectators thread, in January for Where Powers Collide, or for next years Elemental Championships.

That aside, we are going to run a modified event this year. We currently have 6 approved bios, with a maximum of 8 if the last couple submitted get balanced by this evening. What that means is I am going to run a single Paragon arena in the standard format - i.e., your characters interact with Bren and the Arena as normal, so anyone who has made plans for their introduction will not have to modify those. It is assumed in-character that all the other arenas are used every year, so from a story perspective, nothing should change at that point.

When the Paragon Phase comes to its 3 week conclusion, we will then split off from the traditional event. Rather than transition to the Grand Arena, the top 3-4 finalists will be moved to a modified Final Arena. More details will be revealed about finals as they come close, but note that the traditional length and format will be adapted to fit the number of people we have.

With that... the winner of the Arena Poll was the theme for the Sky Arena, so you will be competing in the Trial of Infinity! The arena will go live later today. Best of luck to our writers, and get those last couple of revisions submitted!

< Message edited by Starflame13 -- 7/28/2024 10:37:03 >
AQ DF MQ AQW  Post #: 33
7/28/2024 16:03:40   
nield
Creative!


Name: The Queen of Ashes Atzilah

Element: Fire

Age: Adult

Race: Nazosir (Nazosir are functionally identical to humans)

Appearance: The Queen of Ashes is a woman who appears to be in her mid-late 30’s, who stands at 6’6”. She has skin like charcoal and straight pink hair that falls slightly past her waist. Her eyes are heterochromatic, with her right eye blue and the left green. The Queen of Ashes enters battle in her regal battle-dress, which is a mixture of ornate and practical, with armour covering her vitals and elaborately ornate designs elsewhere, hued in golds and reds.

Capabilities:

Atzilah Flare: An intense and cruel blue flame that attempts to consume that upon which it alights, however this flame will not spread naturally, though with the will of a sentient being it can be transferred from one object to another touching it. Additionally a sentient being other than the Queen of Ashes can take hold of the Atzilah Flare to throw it, though this will harm them in the process. This flame is used with the Queen of Ashes’ right hand and can be thrown or imbued into an object.

If thrown, the Atzilah Flare travels slower than a thrown ball would. When imbued into an object, it will slowly warp and mar the object, while imparting greater destructive force. It takes time to be imbued into an object and even then only can be if the item is held in the Queen’s right hand and requires a few moments’ concentration. The Atzilah Flare is tenacious and even if fully smothered will only be significantly lessened in intensity so long as the fuel it is burning remains, it is capable of burning even without any oxygen. However, if it is fully immersed in water, it will go out.

Atzilah Grace: A less intense flame than the Atzilah Flare, this green flame that the Queen of Ashes uses with her left hand is still capable of burning foes, though that is not its main function, that being to shield the Queen and any allies from other flames and to lessen their wounds. The Atzilah Grace works to the Queen’s will, burning or healing as she decides, though once the flame leaves her hand its intent cannot be altered. The Atzilah Grace is no more or less physical than normal flames so objects will pass through it unscathed, but it will consume lesser flames.

Like the Atzilah Flare, the Atzilah Grace can be thrown, though its travel speed is faster than the other flame’s, being as fast as a thrown ball would be. The Atzilah Grace will not spread at all, only alighting where it is intended to. The Atzilah Grace can be put out easily by smothering it. The damage caused by the flame is superficial, mirroring how minor its restoration effect is.

Kindling Vitality: The Queen of Ashes uses her stamina as collateral to control her flames, should they grow too large or persist too long they will end up draining not just her stamina but even her life-force, forcing her to maintain moderation. She can cause any of her flames to cease at will.

Battle-Queen’s Vigour: The Queen of Ashes is no stranger to battle, wielding her sceptre as a mace with significant finesse. Though she does not stand at the peak of fitness, the Queen is highly capable in all physical areas.

Equipment:

Flame-scarred Sceptre: A once-regal object that has been marred by flames, whatever colours it once held reduced to a scorched black smattered through with drops of red. The sceptre’s flanges are bent and battered and its haft is warped. The sceptre is made from a material with a high melting point, allowing it to withstand the Atzilah Flare better than most objects, though it is by no means fully inured to its destructive effect. The Sceptre is roughly the size of a one-handed mace.

Queen’s Battle-Raiment: Chainmail undershirt, overlaid by extravagant silk, with proper armour plating above. Armour plate cover the torso to protect the vital and while there are armour plates on the arms and legs, these are more decorative than actually functional armour.
AQ DF MQ AQW Epic  Post #: 34
7/28/2024 16:19:10   
  Starflame13
Moderator


@nield - Glad to see you made it work! I definitely appreciate how well you take feedback to heart. I clarified in PMs that the intent of Atzilah Flare is to only spread through the will of a sentient being in contact with it, as well as confirmed that Atzilah is not burnt when she calls her flames to her own hands, but could be burnt if they spread elsewhere. With that, approved!
AQ DF MQ AQW  Post #: 35
7/28/2024 23:44:13   
  Starflame13
Moderator


Bio literally Copy/pasted below from Starstruck, who sent me the revisions but is unable to have computer access.



quote:

Name: Deandra Vill
Element: Darkness
Age Range: Who's asking? Where is your supervisor young man? (Appears 56, probably older than that! Ew!)
Race: Demon, appears human

Appearance: Stout, frumpy, and bleach-blonde, with a permanent scowl and cloudy gray eyes hidden behind large dark sunglasses, Deandra is the picture-perfect image of a disgruntled and vexatious widow with absolutely nothing better to do than get up in everybody's business. Though she is short, she wears high stiletto heels that are too small for her feet, but still manages to walk around with nary a wobble. A string of black pearls dangles on the mottled and liver-spotted flesh of her collarbone, the dull luster coated with a thick layer of dust. It's almost a trick of the light, but something seems to move inside them every so often. Her dress is unflattering, gauzy, and black, with layers of tulle and other light but scratchy fabrics draped haphazardly over her oddly-shaped body. She moves with an odd sense of grace, with a little bit too much movement. Pinned to her left lapel is a black rose, and each of her hems and sleeves is lined with a fine, tattered white lace.

Dust seems to follow Deandra around, and it coats everything about her from her tongue to her hair. It's not hard to follow her trail - dandruff, sand, and pollen settle on surfaces near her, tickling your nose and throat and casting an unsightly pall over her and everything around her. If you look closely, you can see long, squiggly white hairs randomly scattered across the surface of her clothing. Gross!

Skills, Spells, Abilities: Deandra is, on top of being a metaphorical demon from metaphorical hell, a literal demon from actual Hell. This is a twist that nobody ever sees coming! On top of having decently enhanced strength and stamina, she is well-versed in contract and HOA law. A deal-making devil through and through, one must be very careful when entering any kind of arrangement with Deandra, regardless of how benign it may seem on the surface. Deandra does nothing for free, and when she makes an agreement, she never forgets any of the details.

Though she has no power to see inside the minds of others and has no information about the other contestants prior to entry, she can taste if a person has dark desires, like an astringent bruise on an otherwise healthy-looking apple. The noble-hearted have candy-floss souls made of spiced gumdrops and black licorice, but Deandra can catch the scent of a person with a dark secret like a shark smells blood in the water.

When dealing with any trickster spirit, be they fey or fel, it is recommended to abide by the rules. A demonic consultation with Deandra has three.

1. Speak only truth.
2. Speak politely and without vulgarities.
3. Do not interrupt.

There are no immediate consequences for breaking these rules, but a wise person would do well to avoid angering a demon. Deandra can sense deceit implicitly, though NOT lying through omission. Choose your words carefully, mortal!

But wait, there's more! Just sign here, and one of her incredibly nefarious powers will be all yours, for a teensy little price of course! Each of Deandra's magical spells and abilities can be conferred upon a willing vessel through the signing of an infernal contract that takes the form of a long, winding scroll with ominously glowing red lettering. Just look at that fine print! Each contract is custom-made for the signatory, prepared near-instantaneously by Deandra's magnificent team of impish assistants that live in her handbag and eat nothing but crumbs. It will specify ONE value, ONE vice, and ONE virtue. The value? Just one of Deandra's marvelous malevolent magicks, as detailed below, which may not be shared with any other fool- er, acolyte who seeks to borrow a bit of Deandra's devilish delights. The vice? Something useful to Deandra and that she believes will be hard for the applicant to resist. The virtue? Something disgustingly sweet, the righteous thing to do. Commit more of those lovely vices, and you will get more and stronger access to that oh-so-useful demon power (though, so will Deandra). Slip up and perform the specified act of virtue, and the deal's off!

Deandra can communicate telepathically with her prey- I mean, clients, and the link goes even to a slightly deeper level. She cannot read their minds, but has some vague intuitive sense of what their moral intentions are as well as what is currently tempting them to wickedness.

Deandra’s spells can only be used one at a time and cannot be combined in any fashion.

I WANT TO SEE YOUR MANAGER - Deandra unfurls hidden silken wings that can beat the air with tremendous power, though they are quite heavy and can't maintain much altitude. They're really sticky but also hairy and dusty at the same time, which is just 100% gross.

KNITTING CIRCLE - With the use of this demonic enchantment, thread or string of any color or material becomes incredibly durable for as long as she can muster up the demonic energy and ill-will to keep it that way. She must maintain contact with the thread for the enchantment to persist. While the lace and strings on her garment are typically what she uses, she can also resourcefully use found materials so long as they are string-like. Enchanted threads are impossible to cut, though they can still be broken with blunt force or fire. Regardless of contact, threads will lose their potency after about 15 seconds.

DON'T YOU KNOW WHO I AM? - A burst of Hellish flames gather up and then flare out from Deandra's eyes, scorching anything in the very near vicinity with black fire to a range of about a meter. This soulfire, despite its appearance, is not real fire - it carries no heat and cannot ignite materials. Upon contact with a living thing, it inflicts intense, searing pain on all areas struck for a brief moment.

VEXATIOUS LITIGATION - Deandra's razor-sharp fangs have a hidden surprise: magical noxious venom that numbs sensation in the area and weakens the muscles in an affected limb. The numbness only lasts for a few seconds after the initial bite, but victims will feel some sluggishness and weakness for nearly a minute, though the effect fades rapidly over the course of the duration unless reapplied.

KARAOKE NIGHT - Deandra is a great singer...said nobody, ever, except for Deandra herself. Her rendition of "Living on a Prayer" is an absolutely unforgettable listening experience. What she lacks in pitch control, she makes up for with her power to amplify, alter, and even telepathically project her voice. The telepathic projection is annoying, slightly painful, and heard by everyone. It’s just enough to make it so that covering your ears won’t help.

SPA DAY - Wickedly sharp fingernails coated with glittery black nail polish can twist into long dark talons. The gashes left behind by these claws don't heal well, and bleed readily without scabbing. As it so happens, this power has been promised as a boon to one lucky little boy who shall currently remain nameless, so it's unfortunately off-limits to any competitors foolish enough to envision themselves in league with a demon.


AQ DF MQ AQW  Post #: 36
7/29/2024 0:05:13   
  Starflame13
Moderator


@Starstruck, via Starflame13 - Well, talk about taking it down to the wire. I want to make the following three points very clear with the infernal contracts:

1 - There is no negative outcome to refusing a deal, refusing to sign, or going against any of the three recommended rules beyond just making Deandra herself extra grumpy. The contracts do not cause the rules to be binding - or anything else beyond the vice and virtue.
2 - Vices and Virtues must be simple, single concepts that do not cause the contractee to endanger themselves. For example, "Betray your Neighbor" is acceptable. "Punish yourself" is not.
3 - Combat can start slow, but will pick up quickly. Contracts like these by nature slow down the pace of contract. Be prepared as the battle gets underway for the contracts to be ignored, and be sure to be ready to engage physically if they are.

Two balancing points: first, I am making the assumption that low altitude for the wings means at the most, Deandra may manage to brush her opponents shoulders with her feet, and even then only briefly. Second, a minute for Vexatious Litigation is too long even with quick-fading, so I am changing this to the sluggishness and weakness will last for longer than the initial numbness, but the effect fades slowly over time and fades faster the more the blood flows through the area (i.e., the more your opponent moves). Rapid movement could shake free in barely longer than the initial numbness, while freezing up could extend it longer.

While I have been more strict with you in trying to make sure we got this bio submitted in time, I will say good job for pulling back on both the abilities and the concept to make this work with just one formal set of revisions. Approved!
AQ DF MQ AQW  Post #: 37
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