Home  | Login  | Register  | Help  | Play 

Rainbow Connection C&C

  		Logged in as: Guest
  Printable Version
All Forums >> [Gaming Community] >> [Legends and Lore] >> Writers of Lore >> Works Discussion >> Other Creative Works Discussion >> Rainbow Connection C&C
Forum Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
10/12/2010 5:38:54   
Shreder
Member

So I wrote a new prose short story, which is a rare occurrence for me, and I thought I'd go ahead and post it here. Keep in mind that I consider poetry my specialty, prose has never been something I considered myself good at. Therefore, I greatly welcome any C&C people would happen to have. Thanks.

Here is a link to the story: http://forums2.battleon.com/f/fb.asp?m=18218533
DF MQ  Post #: 1
10/13/2010 10:40:34   
Hallie Slidepath
Robot Unicorn Overlord


 I think it's good. It's very sweet. One thing that felt a little out of line was how openly the EMT spoke about the dad's condition with the kid. The main character still feels kind of young, since the school is mentioned, and bluntly stating to a quite young person that his/her father might die somehow didn't feel very real. If anything I think it would be more likely for them to try to convince the kid that the dad will be alright.
But yeah, that's just a thought. I really liked the story, and I really like the song in it too ^^
AQ DF MQ AQW Epic  Post #: 2
10/13/2010 20:54:30   
Shreder
Member

Eh, I imagined the main character being in late middle school/early high school, and if I were the EMT I'd be honest with a kid that age...

Anyways, thanks for stopping by.
DF MQ  Post #: 3
Page:   [1]
All Forums >> [Gaming Community] >> [Legends and Lore] >> Writers of Lore >> Works Discussion >> Other Creative Works Discussion >> Rainbow Connection C&C
Jump to:



Advertisement




Icon Legend
New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Forum Content Copyright © 2018 Artix Entertainment, LLC.

"AdventureQuest", "DragonFable", "MechQuest", "EpicDuel", "BattleOn.com", "AdventureQuest Worlds", "Artix Entertainment"
and all game character names are either trademarks or registered trademarks of Artix Entertainment, LLC. All rights are reserved.
PRIVACY POLICY


Forum Software © ASPPlayground.NET Advanced Edition