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demolitiondragon -> RE: [Poetry] Comments on everything before my writing break. (11/24/2008 23:08:42)
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Sorry for taking so long, matey.
Typical
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Be along, on my merry way.
Lol. (^_^)b
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You aren't a shepherd; I am not the sheep.
Perhaps "your sheep" would fit better, because its as if you're talking to someone?
Imagine
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Ever pondered alternate solutions?
I think that's more grammatically correct...
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instead of a verbal or physical abuse.
"abuse" is usually plural.
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It's humorous to think that such a minuscule
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decision can play a factor in who we are, and what
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in the slightest, to the cry of someone with joy
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we vanquished our hate with putting it away,
Perhaps "by" would be better?
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and not displaying it and taking it out.
"or", maybe?
Different
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you to backpedal into the life-style you're
Scars Of A Destiny
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But, why must the good nature
No need for comma.
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So, why do our dreams get shattered?
Could I suggest "So, why are our dreams shattered?"
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that way, the human heart can take a bear a few more beatings.
"take a few" or "bear a few"?
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The status, currently, it cannot beat another time, unless
I'm not sure what you're saying here.
Keep up the good work. =]
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