YukiKitty -> RE: 15cman's Poetry-Comments (2/3/2009 10:29:49)
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Is it alright if I ninja in to comment on your two latest? "Superbowl Sunday": ...This one made me chuckle initially. It might be just the fact that I wasn't very interested in the Superbowl as a whole, but for some reason it also did seem a little lacking of that excitement though. I don't really know how to state it. Maybe it's just not my tastes. :/ "3": On the first read through I must say that I love how you put that verse into your own words and elaborated on each one of things "which remain." I also enjoyed the tone. There is one spot where you forgot to put a space after the comma, and it's in the following quote: quote:
poverty,fear, Tadah! That's the only problem that I see. Keep up the good work. I'll be reading. ;)
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