Who's Afraid of the Big, Bad, Gnome? (Full Version)

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ArchMagus Orodalf -> Who's Afraid of the Big, Bad, Gnome? (6/20/2009 11:49:01)

Who's Afraid of the Big, Bad, Gnome?

Other name: Balthar

Location: Assault on Popsprocket -> Yix -> Boss Battle and Cutscenes! -> Balthar!
Level/Quest/Items required: 5 Gears of War in your inventory
Release Date: June 19th, 2009

Objective: Not you!
Objective completed: I could have SWORN he was the bad guy!

Scaled Yes/No: No
Experience rewarded: 0
Gold rewarded: 0


Doom Blade
General Sneevord


After a few minutes of listening to directions and a few hours of crawling through dark, dusty, spyder-infested ventilation tubes...

You come out into a... closet?!


<Character> (thinking): OW, that HURT! ... Hmm. This must be the doorknob. I hope.

*rattle rattle*


???: A little help here, please?
Balthar: Hey... THANKS!
Balthar: No really, they didn't even have a toi- er, let's just say, thanks for opening the door.
<Character>: Are you alright?! Yix didn't tell me any of the gnomes had been captured!
<Character>: How did you get here? How long have you been here?
???: I wasn't here at first, I was in my lab with my experiments. Then things started to go VERY wrong.
<Character>: What happened?!
???: My experiments started waking up! And then, well, they kind of started taking over. And started with me.
<Character>: Wait. Are you saying you're... BALTHAR?
Balthar: *chuckle* That's me!
<Character> : But you're the BAD guy!
Balthar: Oh, no. No no no. Not bad! Just... curious.
Balthar: You see, I'd been mapping the lower levels of Popsprocket when I found this glowing orb buried in the rubble of an old building.
<Character>: The Energy Orb!
Balthar: Exactly. But I didn't know that yet. So I took it back to my lab (two turns to the left and up a level, past the Doo-hickey Demolisher).
Balthar: I started doing- well, nevermind the details, they're very technical. Lets just say once I was done, my inanimate Cyklons were ALIVE!
<Character>: You put the widget in the gadget and the sprocket in the sproinger?
Balthar: Something like that. Anyways... once the energy from the Orb had saturated the metal, they were alive.
Balthar: And FAR stronger than I was! But... they couldn't use the orb themselves! So they put this Movement Incapacitor v3.14 on me.
<Character>: To force you to make more of them?
Balthar: Exactly.
<Character>: And you still have the Orb?
Balthar: I do! It's hidden in a hole back in my cell. The cyklons all rushed off a bit ago to fight the togriders and left me with it.
<Character>: I think Yix needs to hear all this.

Balthar: ... And so that's how I got the Energy Orb and the Cyklons took over.
General Sneevord: Curiousity kill cats. Curiousity make cyklons killing machines.
Yix: I'm glad to know you didn't intend this, Mechagius. We hated thinking you'd turned your back on us.
General Sneevord: So what we do now?
<Character>: The Cyklons have been recycled. The Undead are re-dead. Now we need to hammer the dents out of the city's buildings.
<Character>: Yix, you and the rest of the Gnomes should keep the Energy Orb. You can study it and care for it.
<Character>: Maybe Balthar can even find a way to harness its energy and create GOOD cyklons.
Balthar: While I was in my cell, I thought of multiple ways I could have prevented this.
Balthar: I REALLY didn't mean to have this happen. Or become a prisoner. That cell was small. And dark. And wet.
<Character>: What do you say, Yix? Will you keep the Orb safe for me?
Yix: We would be honored. And just think of all the useful things it can help us do!
<Character>: Excellent. Then General Sneevord and I will go pour water on all the sparking Cyklon-parts to make sure they can't rise again.
General Sneevord: We make done war! REAL good!
<Character>: That was the plan!

Sepulchure: That orb was supposed to be MINE!
Doom Blade: Your minions? Dead undead. No using them again now. And the Master is displeased.
Doom Blade: He... wishes you to come see him. He would like to speak with you.
Sepulchure: But <Character> is RIGHT. THERE!
Doom Blade: Now.
Sepulchure: *rage*
Yix: Uh oh. That's-
<Character>: What do you mean "Uh oh"?
Yix: I- I've never seen it say THIS before!
<Character>: Uh oh.

  • Complete Quest

    Thanks to
  • Voodoo Master for coloring.
  • Genk82, Peachii, Sagrym, and Sasuke Uchiha for corrections.

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