(HS) Reality Traveler Discussion (Full Version)

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UnityDestroyer -> (HS) Reality Traveler Discussion (9/10/2011 23:29:17)

The path to discuss the story Reality Traveler.

(HS) Reality Traveler




aizenv3 -> RE: (HS) Reality Traveler Discussion (9/10/2011 23:52:50)

Nice story

quote:

He saw the criminal, and himself. The criminal ran into the portal, Unity followed him to the portal. Then he saw a room full of treasure. The criminal said, "How clever to use the reality to follow me," Unity replied, "Wait what?" The criminal smiled, and said, "You will understand in the right time," Then the criminal shot Unity with his gun, but Unity dodged it, but he got pushed to the portal, and he got back to his office.



He was like "lolwut"




Watziname WAT -> RE: (HS) Reality Traveler Discussion (9/10/2011 23:55:16)

As usual, bad grammar.What's with the one-line prologue?
I'll give ya points on the plot.

To sum it up:
It needs work.




UnityDestroyer -> RE: (HS) Reality Traveler Discussion (9/10/2011 23:57:46)

3 min. difference.

@aizenv3:

quote:

He saw the criminal, and himself. The criminal ran into the portal, Unity followed him to the portal. Then he saw a room full of treasure. The criminal said, "How clever to use the reality to follow me," Unity replied, "lolwut?" The criminal smiled, and said, "You will understand in the right time," Then the criminal shot Unity with his gun, but Unity dodged it, but he got pushed to the portal, and he got back to his office.


Correct?




Clown the Jester -> RE: (HS) Reality Traveler Discussion (9/12/2011 19:05:36)

I rather like it. Its short, sweet, and to the point. Not every story needs twenty paragraphs with tedious descriptions.


Sometimes a quick easy to read, assessible, action backed, story is the way to go.


Keep it up. Oh...by the way...WHO CARES IF THE GRAMMARS BAD? MY GRAMMARS BAD! YOUR GRAMMARS BAD! WE ALL SCREAM FOR ICE CREAM!


HOO HOO HA HA HA HA HA!




star screamer -> RE: (HS) Reality Traveler Discussion (9/12/2011 19:18:05)

Like it, and wat, try using space after periods before saying someones grammar is bad, thank you




UnityDestroyer -> RE: (HS) Reality Traveler Discussion (9/13/2011 4:07:31)

@Clown, and Star

Well yeah... Thanks.

Is backed mean't to be packed?





star screamer -> RE: (HS) Reality Traveler Discussion (9/13/2011 15:53:06)

I am so negative with a positive attitude!





UnityDestroyer -> RE: (HS) Reality Traveler Discussion (9/17/2011 21:16:14)

Again, nice joke.




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