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RE: Think, Question, Repeat (If Desired)/Stripes | Comments

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7/7/2009 11:48:23   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


 Thank you both for the comments! It's quite gratifying to hear that my works move someone. ^_^ Yeah, that's it, I'm turning 9. How did you know!? Birthday's July 9th, so it won't be long now before I post the poem which I wrote specifically for that occasion.

Fabula: Well, Forget is kind of a mixture of both. When I wrote it, I was envisioning a group of strangers gathered around in a sort of impromptu camaraderie, brought together by their misfortunes. However, either one of those interpretations are equally accurate; it's not really described in the poem.

On "that": I'm thinking about it. I keep repeating those lines to myself with and without "that," trying to decide which flows better.

Update: I have added a bit more to This Thing Called Human. This final section, The Dead Warrior isn't finished yet. However, I'm not sure concerning the quality of it, so I might wait to finish in case any critique is given me.

< Message edited by Cow Face -- 7/7/2009 11:57:40 >
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 126
7/9/2009 15:31:18   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


 New poem, written during summer camp, but saved for today. My Fifteenth Wish
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 127
7/10/2009 7:51:53   
Naruto006
Member

Wow. Great poem. Very... unexplainable. really great. Very epic.
DF  Post #: 128
7/13/2009 10:42:09   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


 Thanks, and I'm glad that you liked it! ^_^

New poem, for a different birthday. For When The Light Fails. Some people see religious comments in this, but as a note, that's not how I intended it to be interpreted. :P
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 129
7/20/2009 12:36:52   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


 Finally finished This Thing Called Human. Took me long enough, didn't it?
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 130
7/20/2009 14:14:09   
not steve
Member

...Is that kirby with a bag on his head? And how did you make so many updates without me noticing?!? The dyeing warrior reminded me of the un-marked tomb in Ottawa. I dont understand how you can be such a cheerful person and write these sad sad pieces. Not to say of course that they are bad, quite the opposite in fact. I am not a fan of dark poetry but you have hit on a certain shade of grey that strikes me as stunningly beautiful. But perhaps I am flattering you, yet I cant help from thinking you deserve every praise I have given you because you have worked hard to become what you are now. And I strongly believe you are now a publishable poet.

I frown on "The Decadent Slave" it reminded me of myself all too well, I live a very free and happy life so thanks allot for telling me how meaningless it is. What I didn't know couldn't hurt me so thanks allot running me through with the pike of understanding! (yes, understanding is a pike. If beef can be an axe understanding can be a pike XD) Seriously though, great poem but I must disagree. If you can have a good time than go ahead, what is the purpose of life if not to enjoy it? But I have very uplifting and light philosophy about me usually. You are welcome to try and "make a difference" but I'm quite happy living in the moment.

After reading all of these I am feeling a little depressed. But now I am looking at the reflection in my computer screen into the lustrous forest, listening to the soft wind and watching the sun beat down on on the birds chirping at the feeder. There is some pretty bad stuff in life but on the whole it is a wonderful thing. Perhaps I am a decadent slave. Except the pleasures I indulge in are far more simple and far more rewarding. But why am I ranting in your thread? I should be writing a poem about those birds. XD

anyway, This comment turned out to be a fair bit longer than I intended and allot more preachy. But anyway, till' next time bud ;)

- Doc

_____________________________
AQ DF  Post #: 131
7/20/2009 14:54:00   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


 Yes. Yes it is. Dr. Hobo Kirby! \o/
Oh, I have a very strong dark side, and I'm quite the malcontent. My poetry kind of takes those feelings, knots them into a ball, and chucks them at peoples' heads. I can't tell you how much your praise means to me; thank you very much!

The Decadent Slave made you all sad? Whoops. Sorry about that; I was directing it at people who have the power to fix things but choose not to. There's absolutely nothing wrong with enjoying life! On the contrary, I think that loving the simple things in the world is quite beautiful, and something I wish that I could do more.
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 132
7/24/2009 11:08:06   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


 Tattered Sole, an incoherent poem about incoherent thoughts and lies.
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 133
7/24/2009 14:33:20   
not steve
Member

Lucky custom avatar people, if I'd have not retired by now I would have...ah, who am I trying to kid? *cough* (V totally suits me! I remember the fifth of november XD) anyway, onto the poem. It's really bad, bear in that I only said that to ad some originality to my posts. It's actually pretty good. That "That I am whole?" line left me wanting the last line to be "Tattered soul" but I suppose throwing the title in helps the theme no more than repetition. It reminded me of the not-so-famous Shakespeare quote that inspired the title for a series of my poems.

"Anything that is mended is but patched. Therefore virtue that transgresses is but patched with sin, and sin that amends is but patched with virtue."

It speaks of how difficult it can be to change who you are, at least that is how I viewed it (your poem that is, the quote is pretty clear XD). Excellent theme bud, you are a very philosophical person, I have lost a little of that side of me recently. It's good to read stuff like this.

< Message edited by not steve -- 7/24/2009 14:34:33 >
AQ DF  Post #: 134
7/24/2009 18:42:31   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


 Thanks again for the comment! Excellent quote, I may have to quote (and, of course, cite!) that in my book. ^_^
Also, I like what you said of the last line; I'm going to amend the last line just a little tad.
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 135
7/24/2009 19:10:51   
not steve
Member

It's in twelfth night, act one, scene two, three, four or five. That should narrow it down a bit.
AQ DF  Post #: 136
7/27/2009 11:47:56   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


 Okay, thanks!

Second ever request poem! This one was done for an art-swap (in return for a picture, which is as yet unfinished). It's wrtten in the style of a medieval lay, hence all of the apostrophes and the rather cliche plot. Ballad of Kyota
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 137
8/5/2009 15:19:22   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


 I'mma firin' mah ire lazorz! Just a random burst of wrath here: Nightmares From Dreams
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 138
8/17/2009 12:13:14   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


 Update - Tinted Pane
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 139
8/17/2009 13:42:59   
not steve
Member

XD, I like the new title first of all. It reminded me of my old nickname from the gallery (Doc). Anyway, onto the actual comment. That rhyme scheme is not one that I am used to seeing but it worked very well with the poem, I noticed quite a few of what I perceived to by syllable miscounts but to see them made me feel like I was missing something I should have seen. Yet as I tried I was unable to correct them, maybe I was just imagining it. :P I like the theme, what I took is that something drastic has to happen to change a person.
AQ DF  Post #: 140
8/19/2009 14:51:08   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


 Glad that you liked it! That's how I meant it, yes.

< Message edited by Cow Face -- 11/2/2009 11:50:46 >
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 141
8/28/2009 13:48:56   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


 Update - A poem written from the point-of-view of my character on a yet-to-be-released game: And What Happens Then?

As you can probably tell from the poem, my character is very, very apathetic.
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 142
8/28/2009 17:36:35   
not steve
Member

XD, your poet-self is starting to remind me of Rorschach CF. I agree that some pretty beautiful things have been wrongly destroyed but how were people back than supposed to know? Maybe in a couple hundred years from now people will be mad at us for getting rid of those disgusting houses architects were crazy enough to build in the 80's "Oh, the giant curricular windows were so beautiful!" They will say in mourning "We were fools to knock them down, the asbestos was barely fatal!" an old woman would cry as her son patted her on the back. Sorry CF, I am in a very silly mood. I had trouble with the rhyme scheme in that one in that I couldn't see much of a pattern, but than again I am a stickler for the rules and it still got the message across effectively without being terribly restricted. XD

< Message edited by not steve -- 8/28/2009 17:41:54 >

_____________________________
AQ DF  Post #: 143
8/28/2009 17:52:14   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


 Heheheh, that wasn't really my opinion! I'm not nearly as bad as this guy. At least, I hope not. :3 Glad that you liked it, as always.
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 144
9/1/2009 11:28:25   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


 Update - After reading the excellent play The Crucible, I decided to write a poem about suspicion and lies. Skulk
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 145
9/11/2009 11:59:30   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


 Update - Im in mah mind, writin mah poemz. And what a tangled place it is. Short little poem, written in a moment of meh. Façade

< Message edited by Cow Face -- 9/11/2009 12:00:27 >
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 146
9/22/2009 11:55:24   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


 Update - It's been too long since I've written a poem. It had to be done! Demon In A Perfect World
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 147
9/22/2009 16:42:32   
not steve
Member

Gah, I have to stop auto correcting wording. xD It's a nice poem, it shows how valuable and scarce forgiveness can be for some people witch is a very profound topic. I love your stuff CF, and this reminded me that maybe I should write a poem soon too xD
AQ DF  Post #: 148
9/23/2009 12:33:22   
Cow Face
One Heck of a Guy


 Thank you both very much for your comments; I really appreciate them! :D
AQ DF MQ  Post #: 149
9/26/2009 15:52:14   
Fleur Du Mal
Member

Hiyas, CF!

I thought I'd pop my head in here for a short comment. I read through some of your latest poems and And What Happens Then? really caught me. Very solid and graspable (is that even a word? =P) imagery, a strong sense of being forelorn. Very well delivered, imo. I especially loved this line:

quote:

Fleeing from the darkness but lacking legs to run,

It's a haunting reminder of those stereotypical yet terrifying nightmares where one cannot move one's legs yet one should run...

But as I see it, it's not just any individual line that made such an impact on me, the poem on the whole is consistent, to the point, and transferring images in my mind. Tickling me brain cells! =P Thanks for sharing!
DF  Post #: 150
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