Guardian of Nekops
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Clyde, I am afraid that I cannot respond to your previous post as written. It is internally self-sufficient, and indeed a reply leaps to my mind the second I read it, but I cannot in good conscience reply to it because it does not fit with what has happened with the battle thus far. At least, it does not fit with my vision of what is going on; that may also be incorrect, and if so I require guidance before I can post.
Here is a breakdown of your post and the errors I see in it. The quotes are from your post, Clyde, with all bolding, italics, and other formatting issues my own to highlight issues of tension between my vision of the field and your post. I will check in with my own words once a paragraph or so to explain.
quote:
The tension was rising.
Cyros assumed that he and the Handyman were working together as he watched him flung his weapon towards the Darkness Champion. He had to accept that as an answer since, before the Handyman had a chance to respond, he was interrupted with an attack from the Snake. This crafty cloaked man was brave, Cyros had to give him that. Without so much as batting an eyelash he attacked every other champion with a succession of quick and concise moves. He sent a staff flying towards his newly appointed ally and attempted to send the fire fairy flying back. She was a feisty one and managed to escape the attack.
I cannot find any attack made by Energy upon my character during this time, and certainly not any mention of a thrown weapon. Attacks were made after my triple threat, to be sure, but even then no weapon was flung that I can see.
quote:
What's this? The fairy not only attacked him, but she had the gall to attack the Snake as well? Cyros would show her the error of her insolence even if he had to fight her and the Darkness Champion at the same time. He took the ice that danced around him and formed it into an ice slide underneath his feet. As he ran forward the following trail of ice would break apart and come back together in front of Cyros. After he gained enough momentum he slanted the slide upwards and started skating in midair as he approached the Snake.
There are three issues with this section; I will begin with the one that is bolded. As I read Krey's post, the flighty fire fairy attacked Energy's Handyman and myself. She specifically did NOT attack your character, as you had yet to fall into sin in her eyes. If by him you mean to refer to Ryu's character, who was the actual victim of Fire's attack, you need to be a lot more clear on that score.
Secondly, and most importantly to my own interests, Jarvis launched an attack against your character shortly after the dual pulse which sent the staff flying and threatened Fire. The attack was a vicious sword slash towards your character's face, said sword being jet black in material and writhing with green lines of undead plague magic. If it connected with flesh or any organic substance, that attack would begin turning the flesh/material around the wound undead, its advance only possible to stop using the counteracting force of natural life within the body. Surely worthy of a mention, I would say, and occuring before/during Fire's bombing run. However, there is no mention of that attack here, or indeed anywhere in your post that I can see.
Thirdly, and as a related point, my character is within sword-striking range of yours at the end of my post. According to your reaction to Krey's attack, my post ends right about here on the timeline. Therefore, at a distance of about three feet, you really do not have space or time to run forward, or to form an ice slide beneath your feet, or to approach Jarvis, etc. That distance has already been closed, and we are now in melee range.
quote:
He looked in the distance to see the sun reflect off of the Handyman's glaive as it flew towards it's prey. If Marcos intended on attacking low then Cyros would attack high and be the distraction he needed. When he got just a few feet away from the Darkness Champion he jumped off his ice slide and landed on his feet. The crimson sand cushioned his landing before he withdrew his sword from it's sheath. There was no way he could wait to attack, any hesitation and his opponent would take advantage of it. He swung his sword and brought the still floating ice slide down on the Snake.
Again, our characters are not standing across the arena, one from the others. A circle with a radius of about 10 feet would currently encircle all four remaining competitors, so there is no in the distance, no just a few feet away, etc. We start at just a few feet away from each other, all of us, until someone flees to create more distance. As far as I can see this has not been done. Please correct me if I am mistaken.
From here on the post is solid, and I see no new errors. However, the post has gone off the rails, so to speak, and solid posting and good development on a faulty foundation cannot stand, and I cannot in good conscience build upon it further.
Kellehendros, I would like to request an extension to my time limit to post, as well as an extension to the others who shall be waiting upon my post, in order to resolve the issues listed above. I would also request your assistance on Clyde's behalf, in light of the storm and the power outage he experienced during the short amount of time he had available to post. For him, I would request any time extension he might need to sort this out as well as leniency concerning post editing, if required.
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