Home  | Login  | Register  | Help  | Play 

(HS) Trials of Morality Discussion

 
Logged in as: Guest
  Printable Version
All Forums >> [Gaming Community] >> [Legends and Lore] >> Writers of Lore >> Works Discussion >> AE Fanfiction Discussion >> (HS) Trials of Morality Discussion
Page 1 of 1112345>»
Forum Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
8/13/2011 21:12:48   
Vector
Member
 

Well, I guess this is the spot to yap about my very first story... ( http://forums2.battleon.com/f/tm.asp?m=19468362&mpage=1&key=�)

If there's anything I need to change tomake it fit somehow, (obey L&L rules, appropriate title, etc.) don't even think of hesitating to tell me. I'm absolutely PARANOID about these kind of things and I tried my absolute hardest on that.
Post #: 1
8/13/2011 21:49:48   
Shadowlord9k
Member

I like how this is sounding. I will give more judgemt when there is more, but at this point it is good.
AQ DF AQW Epic  Post #: 2
8/14/2011 0:19:27   
Goldstein
Member

What a great start.
Post #: 3
8/14/2011 11:45:47   
Celestin123
Member

It's a really good start and you should continue your story.
AQ  Post #: 4
8/14/2011 12:44:54   
Vector
Member
 

of course i'm gonna continue it! it's not even finished!

I just need time to put all my ideas together... and hope that the title fits the theme to be revealed later... well, unless you know it already :/


EDIT: keep in mind that the chapters might seem lengthy to me, but they're probably more like... a page or two worth compared to other people's stories... which is less.

< Message edited by Vector -- 8/14/2011 12:51:11 >
Post #: 5
8/14/2011 13:22:30   
Goldstein
Member

Did you like my links? I hope you did.
Post #: 6
8/14/2011 13:38:46   
Vector
Member
 

lol i have my own little audience! huzzah!

you guys mind if i give you an itsy-bitsy preview? ( i mean itsy bitsy, like a flea itsy-bitsy lol)

EDIT: here's the itsy bitsy preview then: the mysterious thing (my HS character) goes to the park to harrass Davinci... without alerting anyone. the story will explain it better once i manage to put the next part up

< Message edited by Vector -- 8/14/2011 13:52:34 >
Post #: 7
8/14/2011 13:47:13   
Shadowlord9k
Member

Not at all.
AQ DF AQW Epic  Post #: 8
8/14/2011 14:00:23   
Goldstein
Member

Oh ho ho, I expect this thing to call in the aid of a certain doctor...
Post #: 9
8/14/2011 14:05:52   
Vector
Member
 

nicht jetzt, Herr Goldstein ;) but eventually it will be forced to seek his knowledge.

< Message edited by Vector -- 8/14/2011 14:23:08 >
Post #: 10
8/14/2011 15:05:28   
Celestin123
Member

Heheheh. Well maybe it'll call in the help of a certain alien as well, of course I wouldn't dare force you to put me in your story,
but I just wantde to let you know that you DO have that option. I mean, just imagine.... you've heard of double teaming, right?

Well how about triple teaming!? Experimental, Celestin, and Goldenstein! Ones a cyborg, the other a doctor, and the other's an alien!

I dont know...it sounds great in my mind...but anyways if you dont want to....then don't as it might mess up the plotline, anyways
that preview sounds great! I never liked Davinci anyway...... Heheheh...........
AQ  Post #: 11
8/14/2011 15:10:45   
Vector
Member
 

believe me, that brat's gonna be in tears after this. ;)

prologue was meant to give some insight into who (or what, at least,) it was supposed to be. hope it helped a little bit.
Post #: 12
8/14/2011 18:32:23   
star screamer
Member

hey I have a question, did you ask rocker if he wanted in your story
either way, great story!
AQW  Post #: 13
8/14/2011 19:27:23   
Vector
Member
 

no, but that should be his only appearance in my story, it wouldn't exactly fit if he wasn't there... besides, he's a total stranger to me. it'd be seriously awkward for me to just randomly ask something like that... sorry! dont hurt me!>.<
Post #: 14
8/14/2011 20:09:25   
star screamer
Member

dont worry i wont tell him! and beleive me I can!
AQW  Post #: 15
8/14/2011 20:25:21   
Vector
Member
 

the very claim that you could tell hm unnerves me. I only meant to put in npc's; the technicality that some players can be npc's too makes me believe i walk on thin ice when i dare to submit any part of my story containing said npc.




i meant it when i said i was paranoid. I don't want to be extravagantly stupid.
Post #: 16
8/14/2011 20:36:52   
star screamer
Member

ill tell you npc's that aren't players
Davinci
Demolicious
the girl in aquatica
arctkiller
dark vengeance
the old ladies
destroyer
pirate
coast guard
bank robber
abd
Death
Hariette popper
Hottica
Lokos
Electina
general smash
Dyintime
Illinois Johnsan
corporal building workers
shop owners
everyone on market street
guys in apartments
medic
Chucky
Mr.Purple
Marty and larry
little girl
there might be others
Llussion and Beleen dont count because they are mods but you can put them in
AQW  Post #: 17
8/15/2011 21:58:23   
Shadowlord9k
Member

I agree with merging the chapters, I mean the break between them felt a bit strange.

< Message edited by Shadowlord9k -- 8/15/2011 22:00:34 >
AQ DF AQW Epic  Post #: 18
8/15/2011 22:18:03   
Sir Night
Member

Liking the story so far. And it's up to you, but yes it might be a good idea to merge the two chapters.
Post #: 19
8/15/2011 22:22:17   
Vector
Member
 

mind you they'll have to stay as they are til i spit out a new chappy, but the more i re-read them, the more i agree with SL9K

EDIT: interesting... i wasn't expecting a war, but I guess it'll have to do. *shrugs* hopefully i can come up with something good about that later.

< Message edited by Vector -- 8/18/2011 15:33:45 >
Post #: 20
8/19/2011 16:07:45   
Arachnid
Member

This is the first story having to do with the war in the park...
Very good! ^^

~Lady Zafara
AQW  Post #: 21
8/19/2011 17:17:45   
Vector
Member
 

i didn't pick my title just so i can make my story about something else though, zafara. hopefully in a few chapters i'll-- hey you changed your avvy!
...anyways, hopefully in a few chapters i'll switch the setting so i can really get down to business. oh! anyone know what demo's dad got sick with? (say a cold or chickenpox) or is it not mentioned anywhere and i have to use my brain again?


EDIT:
quote:

Heheheh. Well maybe it'll call in the help of a certain alien as well, of course I wouldn't dare force you to put me in your story,
but I just wantde to let you know that you DO have that option. I mean, just imagine.... you've heard of double teaming, right?

Well how about triple teaming!? Experimental, Celestin, and Goldenstein! Ones a cyborg, the other a doctor, and the other's an alien!


i might have need of your services, celestin... but not until later in the story. expect an invitation of some sort in later chapters.

< Message edited by Vector -- 8/19/2011 20:08:29 >
Post #: 22
8/20/2011 10:21:29   
Crystal Lion
Member
 

Nice, although I think I was the first to touch on the Park war. Like your take on it, however, and how you managed to twist it so that Davinci got beat.

As for Demo's dad, I'm thinking he has cancer.
Post #: 23
8/20/2011 11:48:14   
Vector
Member
 

it was rarely touched on, so i used it regardless, and that image i made up in my mind with the power tank's explosion will never get old... besides, if davinci kept his tank, he likely wouldve made it back.

oh, by the way, more surprises (and not-so-sir-prizing surprises) yet to come. You there! *points to his own brain* Stop sitting around and get back to work!
Post #: 24
8/20/2011 12:05:07   
Crystal Lion
Member
 

I had a little confusion over the dialogue, especially in the last two parts you posted. Maybe you should state who said what right after each line of dialogue.
Post #: 25
Page:   [1] 2 3 4 5   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Gaming Community] >> [Legends and Lore] >> Writers of Lore >> Works Discussion >> AE Fanfiction Discussion >> (HS) Trials of Morality Discussion
Page 1 of 1112345>»
Jump to:






Icon Legend
New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Forum Content Copyright © 2018 Artix Entertainment, LLC.

"AdventureQuest", "DragonFable", "MechQuest", "EpicDuel", "BattleOn.com", "AdventureQuest Worlds", "Artix Entertainment"
and all game character names are either trademarks or registered trademarks of Artix Entertainment, LLC. All rights are reserved.
PRIVACY POLICY


Forum Software © ASPPlayground.NET Advanced Edition