RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (Full Version)

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Glais -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (6/16/2011 17:44:53)

As long as there's a good chance for Enduras to lose horribly, I really hate him...



Mortarion -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (6/16/2011 18:15:49)

I demand to have all the souls that Tumultu harvests or I'll call all the warp powers, Including Malal and the Forge of Souls



Mordred -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (6/25/2011 1:16:13)

quote:

As long as there's a good chance for Enduras to lose horribly, I really hate him...

Maybe not in the upcoming fights, but when he tries to face Tumultu, you will be pleased to know that there will be epic curb-stomping... twice.

Sorry it's taking a while guys. The Stylix battle scene has been troublesome since both of them are using scythes. I'm working REALLY hard to make sure the physics are realistic.



Glais -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (7/28/2011 2:08:24)

After all this time, I HAVE FINALLY FINISHED IT!
I like the Undead Dinosaurs, that's different. And Enduras in DoomKnight Armor ironically made him more likable to me (for some reason I hated his old look....and DoomKnights).
Also, the final move against Sychor was almost exactly like THIS...wow.

I think after reading it all, the only things I disliked were Falerin's list of Enduras' credentials (they sounded a bit silly once he listed Ninja) and the one line for Each Avatar bit. The scene might've flowed better had they just been removed.

Also, since it was a gods' meeting, why not just have the actual gods there?



Mordred -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/6/2011 21:01:44)

I must apologize for the late reply, and the lack of an update. I've found myself tied down, but I still make progress when I can. :)

Any semblance to any Transformers video games is just coincidence. I thought it was a pretty awesome way to finish it.

Yeah, I'll be changing Falerin's dialogue... a lot. It just isn't him.

I'll see what changes I'll be able to make to that scene. :)



aizenv3 -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/6/2011 21:18:39)

Yea Mordred reading the end, and all i heard was Michael Bay



Glais -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/6/2011 22:19:06)

@Mordred:I figured. Not that it was a bad thing, but the ending was just so similar xD



Mordred -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/22/2011 22:55:50)

New update!



nield -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/22/2011 23:25:04)

There's a few typoes here and there, which I'm quite honestly not going to go back through looking for, but asides from that, it was good. Waiting on the next part.



lordkaho -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/22/2011 23:30:29)

Got around to reading the first 3 posts.

So err, did Lore (Terra) find a way into our Earth or something? Though mixing both realities was clever I'm somehow at loss here.

Oh and

quote:

And his face looked like a pizza


You can rid off the 'a' or use "like a piece of pizza" instead.

Other than that, amazing Mordred. Your writing skills really feel professional.




Mordred -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/22/2011 23:32:55)

Lorians and other beings of the AE universe refer to Earth as Terra.

Older posts are in need of revision, of course. Especially Falerin's dialogue.



lordkaho -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/22/2011 23:39:41)

I see. Thanks.



aizenv3 -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/23/2011 16:16:14)

quote:

Inwardly, Mortimer cursed at the Lords for choosing Enduras. He saw no good tidings in it…


Rebellion in the making ?



Glais -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/23/2011 19:14:02)

Good so far but I noticed some odd things.

First, you refer to Stylix as "Terran Slave" then in another paragraph as Lorian.
Makes no sense.
quote:

He has many plans into motion before even Lore had existed.

But Mordred was born ON Lore...unless you have something else interesting plans.



Mordred -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/23/2011 19:25:33)

Mordred was sent through Limbo/The Void, and was not only sent onto Terra, but back in time. That is the nature of Limbo/The Void.

You should be glad that Mortimer has similar opinions on Enduras as you do, though. Trust me, he's due for an epic curbstomp.



Glais -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/23/2011 20:18:59)

YEEEEAAAAHHHH!
Unfortunately, due to Enduras having an actual backstory now I'm inclined to like him...
But it looks like he'll get smashed first so that should be fun.



Mordred -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/23/2011 20:25:00)

Enduras' backstory is greatly different from Sir Mordred's backstory I submitted for the contest. Enduras doesn't know his own backstory, only that he awoke in the streets of Swordhaven with nothing but a few rags and a dog-tag-like thing that bore the name "Enduras." He had no memories prior to that moment, but found himself enlisted as one of Alteon's knights. Shortly thereafter, he took his leave for Falconreach, and thus got intertwined with Mordred's plots.

Yes, Enduras will be rawr-SMASHED, and will be powerless. He will know Despair like a brother, and ever shall it haunt him. Arrogance shall abandon him, as it always does.



Glais -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/23/2011 20:32:36)

I haven't actually read Sir Mordred's story so...no idea whatcha mean there. Eh I just like the "blocks his potential" part. It's interesting as it's a viable reason he can take out stronger enemies as the story progresses.



Mordred -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/23/2011 20:35:54)

Oh yes. Not even Mordred knows what or why Enduras was locked out from his greater potential. Mortimer unknowingly helped Mordred's plans, of course.



Glais -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/23/2011 20:56:43)

Well, since Mordred IS trying to make Enduras stronger for some reason, unlocking his potential is good for that.
I suspect Mordred would steal the body, but that makes no sense as he's immortal.

Also...when's good Mordred appearing? I haven't seen him since your story was a DF suggestion, along with several other characters.



Mordred -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/23/2011 21:02:38)

Mordred's basic plan is to try to get as many denizens of this universe to "see things his way" before he destroys this universe to make room for another. He sees the most powerful barrier that allows them to hold on to their free-will is hope. So, to crush that hope, he's planned to raise up an equal or near-equal, and give the universe its best chance and hope of holding out. When it is crushed utterly for all to see, all hope will be dashed, and without it, the people will be unable to resist his own will. They will be his slaves.

Good Mordred is present even now. He has been scattered, but as of late, he begins to haunt Mordred like never before, until Mordred is able to see him once more. Good Mordred's chains are long-wrought and heavy but they are beginning to be cast off, and the entity within already begins to make his emergence. Eventually, Mordred will grapple with more than Enduras, and ultimately... himself.



Mortarion -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/25/2011 16:03:57)

Mordred, what are the thoughts off Mordred TUmultu about Mortarion from PAth <to madness?



Glais -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/25/2011 16:18:08)

@Mordred:Well I knew Good Mordred is here, I just meant as to his appearance. Back in the DF suggestion version, I really liked him. I would definitely side with him in the quest-ized version.

Also I don't know, the ShadowScythe lords seem kinda weak. I know Enduras is the hero, but considering his potential is blocked that means he's not as powerful as he will be...



Mordred -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/25/2011 18:21:14)

Good Mordred will gain in strength and might appear before a few people once he has gained enough will-power to do say. Pay close attention to the relationship between Mordred and Enduras, and how it effects the good Mordred.

The ShadowScythe Lords are powerful, but eleven of them have a great weakness that's been alluded to;

They're Forsaken. Their souls have been taken from them(which then manifested as creatures of Darkness that will appear later), leaving them an empty shell. Their existence entails that Terra's Death hunts them down and slowly kills them. However, a powerful will can stave off Death. That's where Mordred comes in. By his will, they are kept alive, with the promise of one day being returned with their soul. However, when he sees that they serve no further use, he lets Death have at them, who has waited so long that he takes them almost immediately. They are used merely as obstacles in Enduras' training course, and once they have been shown to be beaten, they are swept aside for further machinations to take place. Unless their own will is strong enough to stave off Death(which is highly unlikely), they are removed from the game.

@Mortarion: No thoughts as of now.



Mortarion -> RE: Mordred's Vengeance Comments and Criticism (9/25/2011 18:23:59)

Why not thoughts?



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