Interview (Full Version)

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Voodoo Master -> Interview (11/23/2013 5:03:21)


Location: Day Time Falconreach (Book 3) -> Down -> 2 Down Right -> Theater -> Heroic Interviews!
Level/Quest/Items required: None
Release Date: November 22nd, 2013

Objective: Sir Stephen of Coldbear interviews famous guests!
Objective completed: What was your alignment?!

Scaled Yes/No: Yes

Good character:
(1) Fat Darkness Dragon - Boss

Neutral character:
(1) Doomkitten!? / (1) Mysterious G!? - Boss / (1) Brakenberry!? / (1) Lava Titan Xan!? / (1) Wargoth!? - Titan Boss

Evil character:
(1) Spirit - Boss

San Robin
Sir Stephan


Access to Cheese Shop

Good character:

Access to Comedy Shop and Comedy DC

Neutral character:

Access to Neutral Shop and Neutral DC

Evil character:

Access to Tragedy Shop and Tragedy DC


*The theater is completely full. Zevox is about to invite this evening's show host.*

Zevox: Ladiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiies aaaaaaaaand gentlemen!
Zevox: You've been waiting for him, but here he finally is!

*Zevox raises his hand and shouts:*

Zevox: Give a big hand for Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiir Stephan!

*The crowd cheers. Sir Stephan takes a sit in front of none other than Chairman Platinum himself.*

Sir Stephan: Our first guest tried to take over Lore a while ago, however he was stopped by the brave heroes of Lore. Love or hate him but we allllll know him!
Sir Stephan: Chairman Platinum!
Chairman: Thank you for inviting me here Sir Steph-

*The crowd is booing. It annoys the Chairman, so he stands up and shouts:*

Chairman: SHUT UP!

*Then he sits down again.*

Chairman: That's better... as I said, thank you for inviting me here Sir Stephan!
Sir Stephan: Thank you for coming here! I love your suit! Where'd you get it?
Chairman: It was handmade by enslaved minx fairy children!
Sir Stephan: Slavery?!?
Chairman: Yes- they may be small but MAN, they can make a good suit!

*He bursts out laughing.*

Sir Stephan: That's a very nice laugh you have there! Did you perhaps steal it from a dying Gorillaphant?
Chairman: Give me ONE good reason to not sign my ninjas to get you right now!
Sir Stephan: ...I'm famous?
Chairman: ...I like your style! This time you'll get away with it!
Sir Stephan: But let's get to the question many people are wondering about. How did you earn all that money?
Chairman: Part of it is because I sell the suits for an evilly high price to unknowing customers... although so far we only have one...
Sir Stephan: Oh? Who might that be?
Chairman: Someone called "D. When".
Sir Stephan: So what made you decide to become a villain?
Chairman: When I was just a young boy, I had a hamster called Ebil... I loved that hamster as a brother!
Chairman: But one day a company called "Chaos Corps" stole Ebil from me. They were planning to use Ebil as a server hamster.
Chairman: I wanted Ebil back no matter what... I trained a long time and as I trained, my heart grew darker...
Chairman: By the time I defeated the leaders of Chaos Corps there was almost no light left in my heart.
Chairman: I rushed to the server room and finally found Ebil. He was run down, on the verge of collapsing.
Chairman: If I had healing powers I could've saved him, but my training only taught me to hurt and end living things, not heal them...
Chairman: This caused the last bit of light in my heart to dim.
Chairman: From the smouldering remains of Chaos Corps I made a better, stronger corporation and in honour of my lost hamster I called it Ebil Corps!
Sir Stephan: Really? I did not expect that!
Chairman: Of course not! I made it all up! I'm evil just because I want to see Lore burn! HAHAHAHAHA!

Meanwhile backstage

*San Robin is sweeping the floor, when Ash arrives.*

Ash: Hey that used to be my job!
San Robin: It was! But since you're being a popular "Hero" now, I have to do it!
Ash: Well I'm glad they found another sucke-uhm... I mean... person to do the job!
Ash: But out of curiosity, why did you pick up this job?

*San Robin stops sweeping.*

San Robin: Well, with Batoro roaming around at night beating up criminals, Roblos and I, we didn't get as much gold from drops as we used to....
San Robin: And then I found some delicious cheese in some shop.... aaand I maybe kinda definitely spent all our money again.
Ash: Wow... That's just... Wow...
San Robin: Yeah, I feel just as rotten as that time I ate that Carsu Marzu...
Ash: I'll be going now... Good luck sweeping the floor...
Ash (thinking): Geez, what a cheesehead.

*San Robin smiles.*

  • Cheese Shop - opens Cheese Shop.

  • Continue

    *Back on stage, Sir Stephan is sitting in front of Zorbak the Necromancer.*

    Sir Stephan: Our next guest is seen as the pest that Falconreach just can't get rid of! Zorbak the moglin!!!
    Zorbak: Hey! That was uncalled for!
    Sir Stephan: I can say what I want! I'm famous!
    Zorbak: Meh, so be it! Get on with your questions...
    Sir Stephan: Ok! So it says here that you were kicked from Necro U?
    Zorbak: Meh, one little experiment gone wrong and EVERYONE loses their minds!
    Sir Stephan: Experiment gone wrong?
    Zorbak: Yeah, you know how most of the Necro U students are skeletons?
    Sir Stephan: Yeah, what about it?
    Zorbak: Meh, they were human BEFORE my experiment!
    Sir Stephan: What? That's terrible! But uhm... How did you do it?
    Zorbak: Meh, I can't remember... I got knocked out and regained consciousness somewhere nearby...
    Sir Stephan: Isn't that what The Hero does? Maybe you have some hero blood in you huh?
    Zorbak: No! Meh I feel dirty just thinking about it!
    Sir Stephan: Anyway... What were your dreams when you were a young moglin?
    Zorbak: To show all of Lore the terror of EBIL!
    Sir Stephan: Yeah, about that, isn't ebil just a cutesy name for "evil"
    Zorbak: No! Ebil is 100 times worse than evil! Evil people are wimps compared to Ebil people!
    Sir Stephan: I see... Well too bad for you that this is a show about "Evil" villains which apparantly you're not!
    Zorbak: Meh...
    Zorbak: Wait... what?
    Sir Stephan: Security! Throw this "ebil" moglin out please!

    *Zorbak is dragged off the stage while shouting:*

    Zorbak: You'll pay for this you hear me? You'll paaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!
    Sir Stephan: And now for our last guest! Good, bad or completely neutral? Ladies and Gentlemen! The Herooooooooo!

    *The character takes a sit in front of him.*

    <Character>: What? I'm in this interview?
    Sir Stephan: Of course you are! Didn't you get the memo?
    <Character>: What memo?
    Sir Stephan: Twilly was supposed to give it to you! Where is the little fella?

    *Meanwhile, outside, the hero's dragon is sleeping with Twilliy in his mouth.*

    Sir Stephan: That's... unfortunate... But you're here anyway so let's get on with it!
    <Character>: What am I supposed to do?
    Sir Stephan: I will ask you 10 questions. Depending on the answers, we'll finally know if you're good bad or neutral!
    <Character>: Ok, easy enough. Let's do it!

    Question 1: You're walking through a graveyard when you see a paladin fighting a giant skeleton, what do you do?

  • Help the paladin slay the vile creature! - Good answer
  • They look like they can handle it themselves. - Neutral answer
  • Help the skeleton destroy the wimpy do-gooder. - Evil answer

    Question 2: You see an old man carrying a big bag of gold, do you:

  • Let him go his way, he looks like he's ok. - Neutral answer
  • Help the man carry the gold and protect him from robbers. - Good answer
  • Rob the old fool! He doesn't need the money! - Evil answer

    Question 3: While walking by a river, you see a big fish flailing around on dry ground, do you:

  • Punt it even further on land! - Evil answer
  • Well, it's the circle of life. It shouldn't have jumped out of the water. - Neutral answer
  • Put the poor creature back in the water. - Good answer

    Question 4: Someone has been spreading bad rumors about you behind your back, do you:

  • Ask him why he's doing this and politely request him to stop it. - Good answer
  • SMITE him! That will teach him to spread rumors about you. - Evil answer
  • I don't mind, what can one person do? - Neutral answer

    Question 5: You have a crush but there's a problem= your best friend is dating your crush! What do you do?

  • Wish them the best of luck. - Good answer
  • Cry in a corner, but do it so that no one sees you.
  • Tell your crush embarrassing lies about your friend and hope they will break up.

    Question 6: Someone offers you money to kidnap a complete stranger, what do you do?

  • Turn down the money and leave it at that. - Neutral answer
  • Turn down the money, beat the person offering you the money, and bring him to the knights. - Good answer
  • Take the money and kidnap the stranger. - Evil answer

    Question 7: You see another adventurer with a weapon you've been wanting for a long time, what do you do?

  • Challenge him to a duel and steal the weapon after he is defeated. - Evil answer
  • Ignore it and just keep hoping it will drop for you some day. - Good answer
  • Ask him if he maybe wants to sell his weapon. - Neutral answer

    Question 8: You witnessed your best friend committing a crime. What do you do?

  • Talk him into reporting himself. - Good answer
  • Threaten him and force him to be your slave for ever! - Evil answer
  • He probably had a reason, leave him be. - Neutral answer

    Question 9: You are on a desert island with 2 complete strangers. Help arrives to save you, but it can only take 2 people. What do you do?

  • Leave one of the strangers on the island. You don't even know them! - Neutral answer
  • Leave both strangers on the island. You like having plenty of space. - Evil answer
  • Offer yourself up and stay on the island. - Good answer

    Question 10: What do you do in your spare time?

  • Keep on adventuring! Help the people in need! - Good answer
  • Sleep. I can't be on guard for ever you know? - Neutral answer
  • Steal from the rich and give to the po- nah just kidding. I steal from all! - Evil answer

    Good character:

    Sir Stephan: The majority of the answers proved that the hero is indeed a good hero!
    <Character>: Of course I am! I love to help people! I will always be there for people in need and-

    *The other villains get back on stage.*

    Chairman: PUHLEASE! Stop it with the goodytwoshoesness!
    Zorbak: Meh, yeah if you go on with that I might puke!
    Chairman: What about it, you blue rat? Shall we teach this "Hero" a lesson?
    Zorbak: Oooooh yes!

    *Zorbak summons the Chairman's black and red Ebilcorp dragon.*

    Sir Stephan: Well hero, I'd say it's time to summon your titan dragon and beat this beast!
    <Character>: I don't think anymore dragons are going to fit in here....

  • No More Dragons!

    <Character>: What are we going to do?
    Sir Stephan: Then I'll have to use some of my fame power!
    Sir Stephan: Faaaaaame pooooooower!

    *For a moment, a magical circle of light surrounds the hero, then it disappears.*

    <Character>: What was that?
    Sir Stephan: You should be able to defeat him on foot now! Go get em, tiger!

  • Battle!

    Fight the Fat Darkness Dragon. Once you defeat it:

    Chairman: My dragon was defeated.. Again!
    Zorbak: Even with my magic!
    <Character>: Once again I proved that good will always prevail over evil!
    Sir Stephan: Really... That's so cliché to say...
    <Character>: Oh... let me try again!
    Sir Stephan: Nope! That's it for today people! It's a wrap!
    <Character>: But-

    *The sound of quest completed is played, but the quest isn't over yet.*

    <Character>: Aww, come on!

    *The screen turns black.*

    <Character>: Really now... I'll just give up...

  • Complete Quest
  • Comedy Shop - opens Comedy Shop.
  • DC Shop - opens Comedy DC shop.

    Neutral character:

    Sir Stephan: The majority of the answers proved that the hero doesn't really care as long as the gold keeps coming.
    <Character>: Yeah, it's not a dream job... But hey, at least I don't have to sweep backstage or something.
    Sir Stephan: You sound incredibly lazy you know?
    <Character>: Yeah I don't really care...
    Sir Stephan: Now tell me, even you must have a favorite fight!
    <Character>: I've had lots of fights! It's all work to me but if I have to choose, I choose:

  • Doomkitten
  • Mysterious G

  • Magma Xan
  • BrakenBerry
  • Wargoth

    Sir Stephan: Well I've got a surprise for you! I talked to the time travel fairies and they agreed to take you back to your favorite battle!
    <Character>: Wait, what? I don-

    *The character is teleported back in time.*

  • Battle

    Defeat your enemy. Once you do:

    *The character is teleported back to stage.*

    <Character>: Don't do that EVER again!
    Sir Stephan: Did you have fun?
    <Character>: What? Well I did get some gold again so I guess it was worth it...
    Sir Stephan: Spoken like a true hero!
    <Character>: Really?
    Sir Stephan: Nope! That's it for today, people!
    Sir Stephan: I hope to see you on our next special: "Zombies! Flesh Eating Monsters or Sensitive Misunderstood Creatures?"

  • Complete Quest
  • Neutral Shop - opens Neutral Shop.
  • DC Shop - opens Neutral DC shop.

    Evil character:

    Sir Stephan: The majority of the answers proved that the hero is... Evil? ...Can you even call that a "hero"?
    <Character>: Of course you can... But you won't say it...
    Sir Stephan: Why not?
    <Character>: Because I'm going to kidnap you and demand ransom!
    Sir Stephan: The downside of being famous...

    *Then he runs off screen. The character chases him.*

    <Character>: NO!
    Sir Stephan: No?
    <Character>: I... must... resist...
    Sir Stephan: What? What is this?
    <Character>: Get...Out...Off...My...BODY!

    *A spirit of darkness leaves the hero's body.*

    <Character>: Now how did THAT get in here?
    Spirit: My plan almost finished... Stupid hero with the strong will...
    <Character>: Why were you possessing me?
    Spirit: Revenge hero... Revenge!
    <Character>: Revenge? For what?
    Spirit: I'm the collected hatred from all the creatures you ever defeated! You made me miserable, and now you'll pay!
    <Character>: Bring it on!

  • Battle

    Defeat the Spirit. Once you do:

    Sir Stephan: What was that all about?
    <Character>: I apparently beat up too many creatures and their hatred formed a big spirit...
    <Character>: I think they were trying to smudge my reputation by trying to kidnap you...
    Sir Stephan: I guess I'm lucky you're strong willed then!
    <Character>: Yes you are!
    Sir Stephan: Anyway... That's it for today people! I hope to see you again next time!

  • Complete Quest
  • Tragedy Shop - opens Tragedy Shop.
  • DC Shop - opens Tragedy DC shop.

    Thanks to Azan for correction.

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